Recent content by War Machine 212

Yes, make sure to change your picture name :)

Priorities, As we age, our priorities change ........ The other day I came home and was greeted by my wife, dressed only in very sexy underwear and holding a couple of short velvet ropes. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So, I tied her up and went to watch the...

Agreed. I may not post/reply too many times, but I certainly enjoy seeing what you all have to say about the world of metal. And there have been a few people on this forum that have steered me in the right direction for cool tunes, namely TVF. Love your work, mate!!

* HEAVY METAL The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and f**ks the princess. MY KIND OF BLOKE!!! Two married mates are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after...

Salutations from a new member to the UMOS forum. You have my full empathy about your vehicle problems, I'm currently having similar problems with my motorbike; it's been off the road since March 20th!! I'm having withdrawal symptoms.....

The mother of a newly married son goes around to her son's place one day, and is shocked to see her new daughter-in-law lounging around totally naked. "What's this all about?" she asks. "It's my love dress; whenever my husband sees me in my love dress he can't resist ravishing me for hours on...

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she dances she makes the band skip. Yo Mama's So Fat....she puts mayonnaise on aspirn Yo Mama's So Fat....her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard. Yo Mama's So Fat....when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw her peanuts. Yo Mama's So Fat....her...

At least most of you guys will have a chance of seeing them! I am guessing the chances of Iron Maiden bringing their show to the Land Down Under are bleak, to say the least. Unless anyone has info to the contrary, of course........

Real or not, you can't deny that it's amusing, awesome (Wyvern) and hilarious (kittybeast). To Kitty, loved the photo's you posted in the "under appreciated Scorpions" thread. I wish any of the rooms in my house were even close to being half as cool.

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a dating drug on the market called "Beer" to target unsuspecting men. The drug is generally found in liquid form and is now...

Check out the Old School forum. I've only been a member for four days and already have some great tips from other forum members; it would seem to this newcomer that everyone who answers questions in the Old School forum is genuinely trying to help. Post a request there and see what happens.

No doubt some, if not most, of you have seen this, but I only saw it for the first time yesterday and thought I would share it. This is supposedly a transcript of an actual cyber-sex session. How true it is, I cannot attest to, but it made me laugh. This bloke is either the most clueless...

Too right The Scorps rock!!! The first ever thing I noticed about them was at a mates house in the mid 80's, and saw the cover of "Lovedrive". Absolute classic. That album remains my all time fave Scorps record.

Thanks to all respondees. Only my second day as a member of this forum (or any other forum, at that) and it's heartening to receive some positive replies. To sixxswine, check out "Monolithic Baby" as recommended by my new good friend ZoMb!M@N, who posted the first reply. As he says, it's killer.

Copious tattoos and a tricked up Harley-Davidson worked for me.