5 dodgy religous commandments/pints

[pagan2002]

1. thou shalt not drink beer / stella artois
2. thou shalt not go to heaven unless you pray to jesu / guinness extra cold
3. thou shalt not eat pork / gaymers old english cider
4. thou shalt not have lustful thoughts / grolsch
5. thou shalt take your wife at any time / wobbly bob

 

[blackeyed]

umm *cough* they aren't commandments...just thought i'd say

 

[Bastet]

1) i don't know much about religion
2) i don't like religion
3) i don't know much about beer
4) i don't like beer anyway
5) so why don't i just shut up?

 

[breaklose]

hey nothing wrong with 'thou shalt not eat pork'.

 

[Strangelight]

thou shalt not covet another mans wife/Bulmers

Ah hang on thats not dodgy. Anyway, theres nowt wrong wi' pork lad. Didnt that rule come from pork going stale quickly in hot weather? Allah should send another messenger down to clear things up.

 

[Strangelight]

While we are on the subject, I reckon if Allahs a decent bloke he wont mind me eating those big pieces of pork the other night. Its better than hacking peoples heads off, by my humble standards. If he disagrees, then Im a better bloke than Allah eh.

 

[snow2fall]

Anyway, theres nowt wrong wi' pork lad. Didnt that rule come from pork going stale quickly in hot weather?

Yup, it does. If they would've had fridges back then, there'd be no ban on pork. But so far, Allah has failed to send a modern, enlightened messenger down to earth.

 

[bleed_black_orchid]

Crikey Bastet ..

er..I dont know many relgious cammandments

I suppose honor they father and mother or whatever that one is can be seen as a bit shit in some instances. Like parents who kick the shit outta their kids .. Honor them? nar just whack some rat poison in their white lightening.

And Beer Id have to say stella

and screw 5 I cant think of anymore.

 

[Bastet]

how come you all like stella so much?

 

[breaklose]

While we are on the subject, I reckon if Allahs a decent bloke he wont mind me eating those big pieces of pork the other night. Its better than hacking peoples heads off, by my humble standards. If he disagrees, then Im a better bloke than Allah eh.

who said it was right to chop peoples heads off?

 

[breaklose]

Yup, it does. If they would've had fridges back then, there'd be no ban on pork. But so far, Allah has failed to send a modern, enlightened messenger down to earth.

well...you better keep quiet when it comes to discussing our ancestors' mistakes, miss germany

 

[Mick Moss]

who said it was right to chop peoples heads off?

I read somewhere it was a sacred muslim ritual?

 

[breaklose]

please

 

[snow2fall]

well...you better keep quiet when it comes to discussing our ancestors' mistakes, miss germany

And you better don't tell me what to do or not to do, especially when you don't even get what I'm saying.

 

[breaklose]

aaaw poor misunderstood baby

 

[Allan]

 

[siderea]

how come you all like stella so much?

i am wondering the same thing

 

[Bambi]

the fact that stella is nicknamed old wife-beater is a pretty good hint

and for all you secular allah bashing liberals, bear in mind that the regimes that massacred the most innocent people in this century were athiest, nazis, soviets, khmer rice-gobblers, chinks. Allahs alright with me, keeps the sausage dodgers honest so he does

 

[blackeyed]

because stella is the pint that sure to get you shit faced.
gota give it to carlsberg export though - thats one nice tasting larger.

remember when you were little and you thought all beer tasted like you imagined piss to taste....what ever happened to that...

 

[StevenK]

what does piss taste like though?
maybe it is piss!