A.I.D.S. and that whole hamster thing

[Jurched]

If you feel its weird of me to mention this topic, well, I feel the same way. But Billy talked about it first in his song A.I.D.S. and then in his latest interview:

Billy – What is the song really about? It was about a lifestyle choice that could be hazardous to your health. It is a question of morality versus humanity. Listen, sticking a hamster up your ass, whether gay or straight, is ridiculous. Where was the ASA? That was a big trend back then. I was like who the fuck does this shit? You know, those people deserve AIDS and deserve to die. You know, I am an animal rights activist and that is really offensive to me.

Ever since I heard kids joking about it back in the mid-80s, I tried to think its some sort of ghoulish urban legend.

So does this twisted, fucked up shit actually happen?

(I'm not gonna start googling this shit, for fear of what might appear on-screen, and then lock itself into perpetually flashing pop-up windows!)

Jurched

 

[Oblivious Maximus]

South Park did an episode with it. Remember Mr. Slave and Lemmywinks?

 

[Jurched]

Yeah, I missed that episode but saw the advertisements. Still thought its all part of the urban legend. At least, I hope so.

Jurched

 

[MyHatred]

 

[Arg_Hamster]

Keep me out of this discussion.

 

[SueNC]

Yeah, I missed that episode but saw the advertisements. Still thought its all part of the urban legend. At least, I hope so.

Jurched

well, i had a guy tell me about a friend of his that was a nurse in a San Francisco hospital. she had told him about guys/gays that would come in with hamsters stuck up their rear facilities.
they put them in latex sacks and insert them. they get off on the wiggling of the suffocating animal.
the problem for them comes in when they stuff those sacks too far up there and cant retrieve the dead animal once it dies, so they have to go to the hospital to have it removed.
uke:

 

[OldScratch]

well, i had a guy tell me about a friend of his that was a nurse in a San Francisco hospital. she had told him about guys/gays that would come in with hamsters stuck up their rear facilities.
they put them in latex sacks and insert them. they get off on the wiggling of the suffocating animal.
the problem for them comes in when they stuff those sacks too far up there and cant retrieve the dead animal once it dies, so they have to go to the hospital to have it removed.
uke:

I have heard nearly identical stories from folks in the emergency medicine field, so there must be something to it - shockingly enough!! Of course all of us who grew up in the 70's and 80's are probably still naive compared to young folks today. Christ, I was in my mid twenties before I found out NAMBLA was real...I always thought it was just some goofy, sick adolescent/urban myth. What a twisted world...uke:

 

[SueNC]

I have heard nearly identical stories from folks in the emergency medicine field, so there must be something to it - shockingly enough!! Of course all of us who grew up in the 70's and 80's are probably still naive compared to young folks today. Christ, I was in my mid twenties before I found out NAMBLA was real...I always thought it was just some goofy, sick adolescent/urban myth. What a twisted world...uke:

my mama was an emergency room nurse for years and she's told me some pretty bizarre stories about the things gays will 'insert.'

one guy came in with the glass picture tube [old timey tv's] stuck in his anus. his sphincter had tightened down around it and he couldnt get it out.

 

[OldScratch]

my mama was an emergency room nurse for years and she's told me some pretty bizarre stories about the things gays will 'insert.'

one guy came in with the glass picture tube [old timey tv's] stuck in his anus. his sphincter had tightened down around it and he couldnt get it out.

:zombie: When cramming parts of the television up your ass begins to seem like a good idea, it's not only time to question your "sexuality" but your sanity as well. And to think, some wonder why they are considered deviants!!

 

[Jurched]

:zombie: When cramming parts of the television up your ass begins to seem like a good idea, it's not only time to question your "sexuality" but your sanity as well. And to think, some wonder why they are considered deviants!!

Y'know, my wife had such a terrible time at the hospital when my son was born, I likened her treatment to being little better than Dr. Mengele's ward at Auschwitz.

However, on hearing about this shit, no wonder those hospital workers are like pitiless werewolf women from some old Ed Wood flick!

I mean, imagine having a job where you spend your nights cleaning out bed-pans filled with crushed rodents and old television parts...

Shit...! Oh well. Does make me wonder if the dirty cretins who tip-toe their broken asses into the ER with these "problems" ever learn from their humiliating experiences? Probably not.

Jurched

 

[Mythos Inibri]

The SNL hillbilly was funny fer gettin' things wedged in his ass.

 

[Arg_Hamster]

Shit...! Oh well. Does make me wonder if the dirty cretins who tip-toe their broken asses into the ER with these "problems" ever learn from their humiliating experiences? Probably not.

Jurched

"Nurse! Don´t be surprised if I´m here next with with a brans new Sanyo remote up my ass! My boyfriend said he´d buy me a new widescreen for my birthday!"

Idiots never learn. My friend knows this guy who "used the vacum-cleaner for pleasure" so to say. It´s said he ended up in the hospital and calculating his low intelligence and willingness to use household items and firearms for non-intended activites he´ll be a fucking rich man when he slices his dick of and wins a law-suit (he´ll need a good lawyer though).

 

[Ugly as Sin]

Sometimes, the hamsters strike back. http://www.dailydarwin.com/archives/20000824.shtml

 

[Jurched]

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

The story reads like totally made-up bullshit to me!

On the other hand, it does illustrate perfectly well that "love" one man shares with another.

That love we keep hearing about.

Expressing love for one another by shoving livestock up each other's asses...

For some strange reason, the TV was tuned to E! the other night, and who should be on "True Hollywood Story" except Ellen Degenerate?

Throughout the whole episode, everyone was saying what a great life-saving achievement Ellen had committed by stepping out of the closet and admitting she was a rug-muncher... How she saved thousands of teenagers from committing suicide.

Awwww!

They never quite said HOW she fuckin stopped teen suicide. I presume it had to do with the social problems of teens who think they're gonna grow up and shove rats up their rear.

In which case, Ellen did a great injustice by convincing these hamster abusers to stay alive and raid the local Petco with their boyfriends for some evening entertainment!!

In this case, Ellen Degeneres is like the Adolf Eichmann of Gerbils and Hamsters. Determinedly advancing their ghoulish holocaust in the name of "love!" What could be more monstrously criminal than that?!

Better to have those useless, weedy, confused Napoleon Dynamites diving off the tops of buildings than this shit...

Jurched

 

[SueNC]

Sometimes, the hamsters strike back. http://www.dailydarwin.com/archives/20000824.shtml

your first and only post and this is the thread you chose.
good job, champ. we'll be watching you.

 

[Ugly as Sin]

I did go to a more credible "Darwin Award" site and my previous link is more of an urban legend than anything. And Sue, that was my first Darwin story I heard about, so in a way, it is kind of fitting. Distrubing, but fitting.

 

[SueNC]

I did go to a more credible "Darwin Award" site and my previous link is more of an urban legend than anything. And Sue, that was my first Darwin story I heard about, so in a way, it is kind of fitting. Distrubing, but fitting.

we all have our reasons.

carry on.

 

[amaranth24]

My wife is an RN. She said that this guy came into the ER on two separate occasions, both for the same reason. Either this guy's wife/girlfriend was a dominatrix, and she would shove apples up this guy's butt, and it would get stuck and they couldn't get it out, so he would have to go to the hospital. After the apple was take out of this idiots ass, he asked if he could have the apple back.

Anyone that sticks anything like animals or inanimate objects up their butts are sick and should be checked into a mental institution.

 

[Arg_Hamster]

http://www.joecartoon.com/cartoons/652-wuss_in_a_blender

 

[MOD Kicks Ass]

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

The story reads like totally made-up bullshit to me!

On the other hand, it does illustrate perfectly well that "love" one man shares with another.

That love we keep hearing about.

Expressing love for one another by shoving livestock up each other's asses...

For some strange reason, the TV was tuned to E! the other night, and who should be on "True Hollywood Story" except Ellen Degenerate?

Throughout the whole episode, everyone was saying what a great life-saving achievement Ellen had committed by stepping out of the closet and admitting she was a rug-muncher... How she saved thousands of teenagers from committing suicide.

Awwww!

They never quite said HOW she fuckin stopped teen suicide. I presume it had to do with the social problems of teens who think they're gonna grow up and shove rats up their rear.

In which case, Ellen did a great injustice by convincing these hamster abusers to stay alive and raid the local Petco with their boyfriends for some evening entertainment!!

In this case, Ellen Degeneres is like the Adolf Eichmann of Gerbils and Hamsters. Determinedly advancing their ghoulish holocaust in the name of "love!" What could be more monstrously criminal than that?!

Better to have those useless, weedy, confused Napoleon Dynamites diving off the tops of buildings than this shit...

Jurched

=====================================================
here is a link to an mp3 file,of this same thing.
hopefully the link will work.


http://cid-e2f974fd4800b18e.skydrive.live.com/self.aspx/Public/Paul%20Harvey%20Armegeddon.mp3[/URL]


http://cid-e2f974fd4800b18e.skydrive.live.com/self.aspx/Public/Paul%20Harvey%20Armegeddon.mp3