- Mar 14, 2004
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The last two days have been a reminder of how precious life really is.
A friend of mine committed suicide the other day.
His name was Russell Leland Sawyer. I've known him for 9 years.
He was a unique individual, sharp as a tack, equipped with amazing, unpredictable humor and beautiful eyes.
He had a knack for making me laugh till I practically wet myself on many occasions.
The ultimate "optimistic pessimist."
I know you all would have liked him.
I'm sorry I didn't call you more.
I should have checked in on you
I really do feel like I failed you as a friend
If you thought that we all forgot you, you were wrong.
Right before we found out, all of us randomly said something about you
It's as if we all knew you were gone.
I prayed that this was all a sick joke of yours, and I wanted nothing more than to find you, call you an asshole and "punch you in mouf."
You would have been royally fucked up by all of us, but you would still be here. maybe.
I hope that you saw us all today, sharing our memories and tears together.
Everyone put aside their differences for you, and none of us wished this upon you.
This was our last chance to say goodbye.
We all love you, Leland, I hope you see that now.
Peace to you
I keep seeing the imagery of a circle of candles, all burning bright at first, and then one after another they start to flicker, dim and eventually go out. Too many of my friends have died, and I want to prevent this from ever happening again.
If you're in a bad place and you're thinking of hurting yourself, DON'T FUCKING DO IT.
You probably won't believe it at the time, but there so many people out there that care about you and think about you often. Don't deliberate, CALL THEM. A good friend will always be there to comfort you and talk you though this. Myself, and others, have dropped everything to help a friend in need, suicidal or not. We love you. We don't want you to hurt yourself, and we don't want you to die.
Help is a phone call away.
Suicide doesn't solve a problem, it just allows you to selfishly cut yourself out of the picture. It creates a hell for everyone left behind, and all of your loved ones are left in the wake, blaming themselves forever.
Breakups, the death of a loved one, losing a job, failing a grade:
all of these things will eventually fade into the background, and time will heal your pain.
It won't seem like it at first, but things will gradually start to get better. Each day will be a little brighter than the first.
And we'll be here to help you though the grey
Love, Lesa
A friend of mine committed suicide the other day.
His name was Russell Leland Sawyer. I've known him for 9 years.
He was a unique individual, sharp as a tack, equipped with amazing, unpredictable humor and beautiful eyes.
He had a knack for making me laugh till I practically wet myself on many occasions.
The ultimate "optimistic pessimist."
I know you all would have liked him.
I'm sorry I didn't call you more.
I should have checked in on you
I really do feel like I failed you as a friend
If you thought that we all forgot you, you were wrong.
Right before we found out, all of us randomly said something about you
It's as if we all knew you were gone.
I prayed that this was all a sick joke of yours, and I wanted nothing more than to find you, call you an asshole and "punch you in mouf."
You would have been royally fucked up by all of us, but you would still be here. maybe.
I hope that you saw us all today, sharing our memories and tears together.
Everyone put aside their differences for you, and none of us wished this upon you.
This was our last chance to say goodbye.
We all love you, Leland, I hope you see that now.
Peace to you
I keep seeing the imagery of a circle of candles, all burning bright at first, and then one after another they start to flicker, dim and eventually go out. Too many of my friends have died, and I want to prevent this from ever happening again.
If you're in a bad place and you're thinking of hurting yourself, DON'T FUCKING DO IT.
You probably won't believe it at the time, but there so many people out there that care about you and think about you often. Don't deliberate, CALL THEM. A good friend will always be there to comfort you and talk you though this. Myself, and others, have dropped everything to help a friend in need, suicidal or not. We love you. We don't want you to hurt yourself, and we don't want you to die.
Help is a phone call away.
Suicide doesn't solve a problem, it just allows you to selfishly cut yourself out of the picture. It creates a hell for everyone left behind, and all of your loved ones are left in the wake, blaming themselves forever.
Breakups, the death of a loved one, losing a job, failing a grade:
all of these things will eventually fade into the background, and time will heal your pain.
It won't seem like it at first, but things will gradually start to get better. Each day will be a little brighter than the first.
And we'll be here to help you though the grey
Love, Lesa
