As I descended from my web last night...

[Charlotte_Web]

Fellow Artisans of Kayo Dot,

As a spider, I spend much of my time crafting delicate webs. In the middle of my most recent master work, a young creature began furiously gyrating and making the most horrendous noises. It looked like these convulsions were caused by a repeated pounding of the groin area. Out of concern for my fellow creature, I descended from my latest project to check on his well being. Believe it or not, the ingrate attacked me and let off the most pitiful high pitched scream you could possibly imagine.

I am sure you encounter similar rejection from philistine pig ignorants like this one.

 

[xfer]

uh, you must be undead, because i killed you good.

 

[chupe666]

voyeuristic arachnids from the undead. sounds like a troma film.

 

[lizard]

I don't know if the world is ready for eyewitness accounts of Alex's self-pleasuring, however multifaceted those eyes may be.

good job tho

 

[mousewings]

at this thread. Very cool name you got there, Spider. You must be very literate.

 

[Charlotte_Web]

Xfer ah so it is you[/i] who destroyed my life. My web producing ducts . . . gone. My eggs . . . crushed. My eyes once thought beautiful by the most elite of biologists . . . now reduced to a mere 53 facets. Be on your guard. I shall return and this time, I'm fixing to see just how well the human urethra can house a spider brood.

ONCE A SPIDER! I WAS ONCE A SPIDER!

 

[mousewings]

Hahaha,

but don't try it Spidey. Human urethras are highly acidic and not place for a spider. unlike the urban legends say.

Allow me to attack that guy and extract your revenge for you.

 

[xfer]

you are no candiru, charlotte.