Behold! A Message For Retarded Penguin

D

dearth

Guest
IF YOU PRAY TO THE LORD YOUR MALADY WILL BE CURED. DO YOU KNOW WHERE REBIRTH IS? PLEASE INFORM HIM THAT I AWAIT HIS REPLY TO MY EARLIER COMMUNIQUE.

The Lord will afflict you with the boils of Egypt and with tumors, festering sores and the itch, from which you cannot be cured. The house of Dehuti-necht stood close to the side of the path, which was narrow, not wide. The peasant came along the path which was the common highway. Then said Dehuti-necht: "Look out, peasant, do not trample on my clothes!" The peasant answered: "I will do as you wish; I will go in the right way!" As he was turning to the upper side, Dehuti-necht said: "Does my grain serve you as a road?" Then said the peasant: "I am going in the right way. The bank is steep and the path lies near the grain and you have stopped up the road ahead with your clothes. Will you, then, not let me go by?" Upon that one of the asses took a mouthful of grain. Then said Dehuti-necht: "See, I Will take away your ass because it has eaten my grain."
 
HAHA, yeah, and that's why there aren't many retards in the world. Seriously though, I love your parodying, you do great work. :lol: Keep it up.
 
Lord of Metal said:
Oh, and I've been wondering, what is it that you lack?

BEHOLD! I LACK PRACTICAL WISDOM, AND THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION I HAVE ASKED OF REBIRTH. IN FIVE MONTHS TIME I HOPE TO HAVE THE ANSWER, AND HAVE THE FORMER DEFICEINCY SOLVED AS WELL.


Surely We established him in the land and granted him means of access to every thing. Hueitse was Prime Minister in the Liang State, and Chuangtse was on his way to see him. Someone remarked, "Chuangtse has come. He wants to be minister in your place." Thereupon Hueitse was afraid, and searched all over the country for three days and three nights to find him. When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith." His temple is open towards the the south-east, and Re rises daily opposite him. South of it the water is inapproprate for a mile. A wall guarded day and night separates the Nubians. There is a mountain massif in its eastern region (of Elephantine) containing all the ores, all the precious stones and all the things sought for building the temples of the gods of the North and South, the stalls for sacred animals, the pyramid for the king, all statues that stand in temples and in sanctuaries. Moreover, incense is set before the face of Khnum and around him.
 
BEHOLD THOU NUTSACKAGE

"On Saturday night I would see men lusting after half-naked girls dancing at Junny's scabb-arama,and on Sunday morning when I was playing the ORGAN for tent show evangelists at the other end of the carnival.I would see these same scabb collecting men shitting in the pews with there wives and children and chickens,asking God to forgive them and purge them of canal desires.And the next Saturday night they'd be back at the scabb carnival or some other place of indulgence

I knew then that the scabenger Christian Church thrives on hypocracy.and that man's carnal scabb hunt will over take his soul
 
"On Saturday night I would see men lusting after half-naked girls dancing at Junny's scabb-arama,and on Sunday morning when I was playing the ORGAN for tent show evangelists at the other end of the carnival.I would see these same scabb collecting men shitting in the pews with there wives and children and chickens,asking God to forgive them and purge them of canal desires.And the next Saturday night they'd be back at the scabb carnival or some other place of indulgence

I knew then that the scabenger Christian Church thrives on hypocracy.and that man's carnal scabb hunt will over take his soul

-------------------

AHA! Finally, a word of the opposing view. Whew, never thought it end. Anton Levay, could for a hearty anti-christian rant if nothing else!
 
Lord of Metal said:
It seems as the word of god is spread across this board, it becomes more chaotic and insane.

LOM!! especially you, should understand that the quest is in
learning theology!
Chaotic and insane? I think it's entertainment!

-x-
Iris
 
retarded penguin said:
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

*runs*

BEHOLD! THERE IS NO POINT TO RUN, FOR YOU DO SO ON A CIRCULAR PATH WHERE THE END AND THE BEGINNING ARE ONE.

And I saw a beast coming out of the sea. He had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on his horns, and on each head a blasphemous name. The beast I saw resembled a leopard, but had feet like those of a bear and a mouth like that of a lion. The dragon gave the beast his power and his throne and great authority. One of the heads of the beast seemed to have had a fatal wound, but the fatal wound had been healed. The whole world was astonished and followed the beast. Men worshiped the dragon because he had given authority to the beast, and they also worshiped the beast and asked, "Who is like the beast? Who can make war against him?"
The beast was given a mouth to utter proud words and blasphemies and to exercise his authority for forty-two months. He opened his mouth to blaspheme God, and to slander his name and his dwelling place and those who live in heaven. He was given power to make war against the saints and to conquer them. And he was given authority over every tribe, people, language and nation. All inhabitants of the earth will worship the beast--all whose names have not been written in the book of life belonging to the Lamb that was slain from the creation of the world.
 
actually, the path was not circular, more of a dilapitaed prismatic quadrilateralized hexagonal pentagram.
 
Yes, it is very entertaining. I just thought I would point out that god creates more chaos than peace. But, yes, I find this parody extremely entertaining.
 
BEHOLD!! as i shall drive insane when i see nothing but
shaking asses in front of my face! ;) :lol:

-x-
Iris

Well, by the 1st of juli, I can move into my own place so..
Anyone in for a housewarming party? :)