daylight dies, opeth inspired riffing...

[samara]

hey everyone...
I've been listening to lot of doom-death latley and got into daylight dies a while ago so I tried to make something similar, that sounds intentionally out of key and just out of tune on purpose... to give it a chaotic dark type atmosphere... I'm interested in what you think both about the production and the riffing... it's offcourse just scratch ideas and stuff and breaks and stuff need to be fixed.... I think I nailed a daylight dies no reply type sound pretty spot on personally I want to hear the pros oppinion on this msg board....
here is the link,

 

[mr.L.]

Sounds very muffled and there is a great deal of nastily pumping and distorting low end and the piano (I gues that's what I'm hearing) and bass are getting buried. The atmosphere is definitely chaotic partly also because of the rather sloppy playing. So production wise I can't say I'm a big fan of this, sorry.

Some of the riffing is pretty nice though, but it sounds like a collection of ideas not a song. I would try to work some more on the songstructure and inserting some less chaotic parts, so that you have some dynamics in the song. I think that there are probably enough ideas in here to make three songs out of.

 

[samara]

thnx for the response..... hrmmm is this any improvement.... the toms need more work but how does the mix work otherwise? http://dl.getdropbox.com/u/315602/ddtest.mp3
not enough bas now, right???? the snare is to thin sounding??? =( help me out...

 

[mr.L.]

Yeah too little bass with this mix. Turn up the bass guitar. Also the guitars are rather loud and have a bit of nasal sound (try doing some eq around 1000-1500 hz and pull them down a bit). Also your mix is rather loud, I would run it less hot. That should make it easier to get the drums to punch through and make it less shrill sounding. The snare is a bit buried at the moment and seems to miss some high end. But all in all it's definitely an improvement over your first mix!