Dear Xfer: Wingnut Korner

Pete from the DarkWindow has up this excellent post (Pete's commentary in yellow, Newsmax drivel in white):

Monday, November 01, 2004

The Poker Face Of George W. Bush

Thanks to reader SocraticSilence, our attention was drawn to a fine article about our fearless President over at NewsMax. It's called The Poker Game: Bush vs. Kerry on 9/11 <http://newsmax.com/archives/articles/2004/10/31/141125.shtml> and it's by Joan Marie Nagy.

Imagine, if you will, that in the world of international power and intrigue a high-stakes poker game is being played. The stakes: Western civilization. The game: 9/11.

The cards are dealt. Nines and aces are wild. The game begins when war is unofficially declared.

When President Bush learned of the Sept. 11 attacks, what the world saw was the classic poker face, the non-reaction reaction. What Bush understood, in that split second, was that not only would the entire world be watching his reaction, so, too, would the next wave of terrorists.

Yep. That's exactly what I gathered by watching his face. Split-second recognition of complex issues and an instant understanding that he'd only defeat the terrorists by sitting in a small chair with a children's book in his hands.

bush-911-1m15.jpg

The "non-reaction reaction"

The terrorists would study his reaction and gather valuable information on how he would play his next hand. His reaction would reveal to them the sum of his mettle as a man and the tenacity of his exploits as their future opponent.

And his reaction had them quaking in their sandals, ladies and gentlemen. How could they have possibly known he'd keep reading that book?

With a steely determination the president’s expressionless gaze moved across the room and seemed to look out beyond the walls and into the future.

'I wonder what's for dinner tonight,' he thought bravely. 'I wonder if this means I have to eat with Dick and Karl again.'

What cards was Bush holding close to his vest?

I think that was Andrew Card, telling the President what had happened. Wise of him to ignore it.

Did he have three of a kind, a straight, or a royal flush? Who could tell?

Certainly not the President.

Bush’s expression was unreadable, his demeanor calm, his mind calculating.

His reading skills at a grade-school level.

The terrorists watching must have been disappointed with the cool, composed and measured response.

If by cool, composed and measured response, you mean no response, then yes. They must have been.

Bush gave the terrorists nothing that day.

No kidding, huh.

Sen. John Kerry, a power wannabe, not even in the game, eagerly reveals how he would have played his hand. The elite French appeaser quickly lays all his cards on the table with childlike enthusiasm in an effort to prove that he is smarter than his opponent. He criticized Bush for sitting still and continuing his agenda.

Let's just be clear about something. Bush's agenda was to read My Pet Goat with schoolchildren.

Kerry’s strategy: Had he been in the game he would have quickly jumped up, explained to the "kids" in the room that he had important business to attend to and rushed off as the big and important person he was, or as he perceives himself to be.

Yes, nothing big and important about being President of the United States.

In doing so, he would have undeniably confirmed himself to be of French descent, inadvertently revealing himself to be a reactionary, willing to act before being in command of all the facts, easily read and, even more important, easily led – in essence, a puppet.

Interesting logic. Immediately trying to ascertain what has happened and deciding what to do makes one French and a puppet. Sitting and waiting for one's handlers makes one a steely man of decisive power.

Great truths are often revealed in small arenas. In this high-stakes poker game, where our lives are in the balance, we can choose to have our hand played with the caginess of a panther or the weakness of a puppet.

Or, in the case of NewsMax, with the nuttiness of a walnut tree.
 
In doing so, he would have undeniably confirmed himself to be of French descent, inadvertently revealing himself to be a reactionary, willing to act before being in command of all the facts, easily read and, even more important, easily led – in essence, a puppet.
This is just about the best thing ever.
 
I'll be the first to fire a shot across the bow of France, like with their stupid laws supposedly designed to defend their superiority against American cultural depradations.
The simple fact is that the entire world wants American stuff. they want our food, our movies, they want our lowbrow hiphop, etc. there's not accounting for taste, but there's also no denying that right now, with pervasive mass media, you cannot escape the alluring temptations of the USA.
 
their culture is totally weak.

if they weren't obsessed with xenophobic notions of purity, they'd understand that cultures change and flux and that doesn't make your culture "less French" because it has evolved.

they pretend to be leftist and screw it up for real leftists, the way Bush makes real conservatives cringe and say "we're not like that!"

they committed the first terror attack ever against New Zealand.
 
I kind of appreciate how they don't want base entertainment poisoning their Frenchie ways, but then again they like Jerry Lewis so you can't take it seriously.
 
I think a lot of that is just that the American culture is the antithesis of what the French culture is. For example, French cuisine is probably the most refined cuisine in the history of man, it has evolved throughout the centuries into complicated and difficult dishes that are served in small quantities. You guys invented fast food and burgers as big as my head. Most french movies, including ones that gross a lot of money, are character driven, or psychologically driven movies that often have not much of a plot. Hollywood produces mostly big budget action movies with a somewhat of plot and if possible the most thinly developped characters.

Also part of it is the US is a big bully and the French are proud enough to say: Allez vous faire enculé!
 
translate?

I think you have some points. I also think it's funny how American food has become so much better than French food exactly because of the French fear of how much American food sucked. American movies have also made giant strides against French films--not as much as the food has, but in many important (read: not just moneywise)ways American movies already surpass the French film tradition.

cultural syncretism is a wonderful, wonderful thing, and makes for a hardier and better organism than an isolated one.
 
Lose translation is: you can get yourself ass-fucked. Typically French way flip somebody off (it is not used here, just so you know)

I totally agree that not all the American culture is crap, just what it represents and what is projected abroad. You don't see Charlie Trotter (like him or not) opening a restaurant in Paris, you see McDonald's. As far as movies goes I think a lot of the strides the American movies have made came in the seventies, nowadays I think it is a lot more a question of quantity that makes it look like you produce a lot of better movies.
 
I think the quantity makes us look worse, because there's so much garbage (which often seems to rise to the economic top). But there's still enormously good films underneath that.
 
I am not sure this is so much the case anymore. The US culture is so ingrained in the French one by now that I don't think it is the case (BTW, the French are much more Americanized than we can be in Canada, english Canada included)

Whe I mean big bully the best example is with Genetically Modified food. When the legislation passed in France so that all GMO had to be labeled the US complained like crazy and decided to boycott importation of a lot of french products. Instead of trying to negociate and crap in their pants like other countries do (including Canada, see wood and beef problems you guys have been giving us) the french slapped a tax so high on importation of beef (not to mention all the beef fed with GMO's that couldn't get in) and exportation of wine that it became like a boycott.

Note that this was before the EU legislation.