I got a summons for jury duty, and if i have to go i will miss valuable time in the end of my schooling, and my job (both full time. Help me think of ways to get thrown out... I plan on bringing the most satanic cds i have, shaving my head the night before, and saying i hate blacks, jews, mexicans etc.. etc.. any other suggestions?
Give me ideas...
- Thread starter Merloch
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theodyssey
Best Album of the Year
haha, just say that you are prejudice against all races. That's what it said on the simpsons season 4 dvds that i just purchased. Wear a dimmu borgir shirt if you have one, or cradle of filth. Whether or not you think they suck, no one is going to argue with throwing out someone with "Jesus is a Cunt" in big bold letters on the back of their shirt 
good call on that one. You could also blast Johny Rebel in your cd player when you go in. Don't take a shower. Draw an inverted cross on your forehead. Put black-metal folk make-up on. Talk like Danny Filth does. Keep your fly down. Have a piece of toilet paper hanging out your pants. Draw a Hitler mustache on yourself. Bring drum sticks in and bang them against something thinking about Vehemence or something cool. Don't wear deoderant, eat a burrito or something right before you go, don't brush teeth, and let off gas whenever you can. Any or all of those work.
Nico
Onward!
Dress well and look neat. Make yourself seem important with a breifcase and pens in your shirt pocket. No-one wants an intelligent citizen on the jury
VEHEMENCE
Helping The World To See
Yeah man, the rapist, bi hicular manslaughter"er might come after you for their case being lost haha. I was summoned before our Impaled/Decapitated tour but I got out of it somehow. Said I was sick or in the hospital or something.
I can just imagine you explaining to the court... No, i cannot do this because I will be touring with my great band, and another great band called Decapitated! hahahaha
neal
wizard in black
or you could tell them that jury duty would make you miss all your finals and youd fail all your classes. you should still wear a metal shirt of course, but you actually do have a valid reason. they'll let you go.
Hahaha i got temporary excusal, but that probably means I will be called back as soon as I start a new job..
christcrusher
Goddess of All
Just do all the things suggested...if you have to go in, then you have to go in you know...there really isn't getting around it unless you make up the excuses in the courthouse...
christcrusher said:
and dont forget that while waiting there you should quietly repeat lyrics to songs, just loud enough so people close to you can hear.. id recomment Deicide's "Fuck Your God"... thats what i do to get people to leave me alone
VEHEMENCE
Helping The World To See
christcrusher
Goddess of All
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