help me!

please refer to previous comment!
You can't go onto a forum and expect people to just listen to something you have posted up without so much as anything hinting towards participation in the forum.
Go to the self advertising forum for such things if this is all you want to do!
 
But he was so polite! And considering he isn't posting it to every other forum (yet), I'm sure he valued our opinion above everyone else's.

Checking it out now, Spiney - feel free to discuss things and make yourself at home... but if you're just here to spam then... grr...

:)
 
I'm no guitarist, but it's better than anything I could do.
Plus if you wrote it yourself, again it's better than anything I could do. Would obviously sound better with bass and drums though. :)

Maybe a guitarist could actually give it a listen and give you some tips..
 
Yeah, Sydo's right. Needs bass and drums to really tell. But that said, it's not too bad. Nothing really ground breaking, lets be honest, but it could go somewhere.