Humerous!
- Thread starter VangelicSurgeon
- Start date
xfer
I JERK OFF TO ARCTOPUS
FuSoYa
Lunarian
minxnim
meow
chupe666
You may enter up to 25 ch
-Most wine experts frown upon serving a peignoir with white meat. This is primarily because a peignoir is a type of lingerie.
-In Europe, wines are named according to the region from which they come. Among the most popular are wines from the Bordeaux region of France and the Night Train region of Italy.
-When dining with friends at a restaurant, order the second-least expensive wine on the list. If on a date, order the fourth-least expensive.
-If you are uncertain whether to select a merlot or beaujolais for a spring breast-of-lamb garden dinner, avoid making a decision until we come down to beat the living crap out of you.
-Many liquor stores offer a "Try Before You Buy" program, whether they know it or not.
-When sipping wine at a Catholic eucharist, swallow quickly, before the wine undergoes the miracle of transubstantiation and you get the unpleasant taste of a mouthful of human blood.
-Distinctly fruity overtones are the mark of a good sommelier.
-The quality of a wine is inversely proportional to the viciousness of the animal depicted on the label.
-Aw, man, once in high school, my friends and I got totally ripped on this wine Eric's older brother bought for us. I don't remember the name, but it was all pineapple-flavored. That was the night we got kicked out of Arby's.
-The proper glass is crucial to wine enjoyment. Before pouring wine, thoroughly rinse out the remnants of your cherry Icee.
-When throwing a tasting party, never serve more than one category of wine. [This tip courtesy of The Guide To Sucking Every Bit Of Joy And Spontaneity Out Of Living.]
-In Europe, wines are named according to the region from which they come. Among the most popular are wines from the Bordeaux region of France and the Night Train region of Italy.
-When dining with friends at a restaurant, order the second-least expensive wine on the list. If on a date, order the fourth-least expensive.
-If you are uncertain whether to select a merlot or beaujolais for a spring breast-of-lamb garden dinner, avoid making a decision until we come down to beat the living crap out of you.
-Many liquor stores offer a "Try Before You Buy" program, whether they know it or not.
-When sipping wine at a Catholic eucharist, swallow quickly, before the wine undergoes the miracle of transubstantiation and you get the unpleasant taste of a mouthful of human blood.
-Distinctly fruity overtones are the mark of a good sommelier.
-The quality of a wine is inversely proportional to the viciousness of the animal depicted on the label.
-Aw, man, once in high school, my friends and I got totally ripped on this wine Eric's older brother bought for us. I don't remember the name, but it was all pineapple-flavored. That was the night we got kicked out of Arby's.
-The proper glass is crucial to wine enjoyment. Before pouring wine, thoroughly rinse out the remnants of your cherry Icee.
-When throwing a tasting party, never serve more than one category of wine. [This tip courtesy of The Guide To Sucking Every Bit Of Joy And Spontaneity Out Of Living.]
Stultus
Words to live by
The Onion is getting very bland nowadays, where the whole of the funny is condensed into the title, and actually reading the full article is masochistic. I only check the Onion out of habit nowadays, as even the horoscopes have gotten mediocre. In fact, the funniest thing about the latest update was the commercial for "One Hour Photo" where it said "He knows your where you live." Alas they they fixed that.
SatireWire is still quite good, though.
I could make a joke about the Onion making me cry and add an amazingly funny images.google find to boot, but I'll refrain.
SatireWire is still quite good, though.
I could make a joke about the Onion making me cry and add an amazingly funny images.google find to boot, but I'll refrain.
minxnim
meow
-When sipping wine at a Catholic eucharist, swallow quickly, before the wine undergoes the miracle of transubstantiation and you get the unpleasant taste of a mouthful of human blood.
i hate when that happens.
i hate when that happens.
Stultus
Words to live by
Thanks a lot.
Here I was finally able to initiate a discussion about the recent inanity of the Onion (in my opinion, of course) and you had to gracefully avoid that part completely.
topple that damn onion!
Here I was finally able to initiate a discussion about the recent inanity of the Onion (in my opinion, of course) and you had to gracefully avoid that part completely.
topple that damn onion!
xfer
I JERK OFF TO ARCTOPUS
I think the Onion still has a lot of great shit. I mean, there's no more Zweibel, but there are captions like "Boss' Dick Isn't Going to Suck Itself".
