I like this (but did not want to hijack prep's thread)

The following is from the Washington Post Style Invitational contest. Contestants are asked to submit "instructions" for something (anything) written in the style of a famous person. The winning entry was "The Hokey Pokey" (as written by W. Shakespeare).

O proud left foot, that ventures quick within
Then soon upon a backward journey lithe.
Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:
Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.
Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke,
A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.
To spin! A wilde release from Heavens yoke.
Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl.
The Hoke, the poke -- banish now thy doubt
Verily, I say, 'tis what it's all about.

-- by William Shakespeare (Jeff Brechlin, Potomac Falls)


For anyone who doesn't know the song, here's what Shakespeare had to work with:

You put your left foot in,
You put your left foot out;
You put your left foot in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the Hokey-Pokey,
And you turn yourself around.
That's what it's all about!