KD is NOT for everybody

Nut Butter

QTΠ
Nov 27, 2003
986
0
16
Chocolateland
Just came across this on ze web:

"Well let's just say, if you think TOOL are too 'poppy', MOGWAI and AEROGRAMME sound to much like grunge, CELTIC FROST's "Into The Pandemonium" is a horribly dated 80's relic, PINK FLOYD was too mainstream even when Syd Barrett was still in the band, GOBLIN's soundtracks to Dario Argento-movies aren't actually all that scary, the first two GODFLESH albums qualify as rave shit, SIGUR RSS would be a lot more enjoyable if they showed some proverbial balls, most doom bands are just whiny goth-chicks, SONIC YOUTH aren't artsy-fartsy enough, RADIOHEAD are a bunch of emo-pussies and the perfect guitar music is the kind made by 'modern' composers like RHYS CHATHAM and GLEN BRANCA then this album could very well be of interest to you.

All others, STAY THE FUCK AWAY!! THIS RECORD BITES!! LITERALLY!!"
 
Idiots. I've been pleasantly surprised with my friend's reactions to Choirs of the Eye, nearly all have liked it and even a few loved it. Good for them!
 
THE ENTIRE REVIEW:
KAYO DOT - "Choirs Of The Eye", 2003 (Tzadik)


As some of you may know, Peacedogman himself has often indicated that yours truly is perfectly suited for reviewing some of the more "adventurous" stuff. Well, "adventurous" doesn't even begin to describe this release, which has only 5 songs in 56 minutes and is released on JOHN ZORN's Tzadik Label.

After a drums and guitar intro straight out of RHYS CHATHAM's "Die Donnergvtter" we get horns, flutes, weird background noise and some sparse, gentle guitar plucking. After a while this suddenly and without any warning is interrupted by an immense wall of doom guitar and grunting voices, until things just as suddenly settle down again. Whew! And then we're only halfway through the first song.

This is definitely an album of extremes. You'll find long, almost ambient parts (occasionally accompanied by spoken word) that bring to mind SIGUR RSS or THIS MORTAL COIL. There's the pretty, melodic and sometimes actually quite beautiful passages with high-pitched vocals quite reminiscent of JEFF BUCKLEY or THOM YORKE (RADIOHEAD). And then there are of course the loud parts, which can only be described as downright violent!
And all along there's also violins, cello's, woodwinds, clarinet, piano and what have you, and amazingly enough it never gets boring, tedious or too overdone. Obviously KAYO DOT have put a lot of thought in their compositions. Now, adventurous or not, personally I couldn't care less about bands like GODSPEED YOU BLACK EMPEROR! and most music labeled post-rock bores me to death, but somehow KAYO DOT live up to their pretensions, because "Choirs Of The Eye" is a great record. It's not an album to play every day, and it's most certainly not for everybody... but it's still great.

Since this album is not for everybody, then who is it for you ask?

Well let's just say, if you think TOOL are too 'poppy', MOGWAI and AEROGRAMME sound to much like grunge, CELTIC FROST's "Into The Pandemonium" is a horribly dated 80's relic, PINK FLOYD was too mainstream even when Syd Barrett was still in the band, GOBLIN's soundtracks to Dario Argento-movies aren't actually all that scary, the first two GODFLESH albums qualify as rave shit, SIGUR RSS would be a lot more enjoyable if they showed some proverbial balls, most doom bands are just whiny goth-chicks, SONIC YOUTH aren't artsy-fartsy enough, RADIOHEAD are a bunch of emo-pussies and the perfect guitar music is the kind made by 'modern' composers like RHYS CHATHAM and GLEN BRANCA then this album could very well be of interest to you.

All others, STAY THE FUCK AWAY!! THIS RECORD BITES!! LITERALLY!!
 
Just reading that last paragraph sounded extremely condescending, but in the context of the whole review it sounds positive. Especially the part where he/she/it says "'Choirs Of The Eye' is a great record."
 
haha, better watch out or this record will bite you! LITERALLY!

I love it when people misuse that word without even realizing it...funny stuff.
 
To set the record straight, I never meant to say it was a negative review...

I just thought his criteria for KD fans were pretty funny and sometimes quite ???-inducing. Like "doom bands are just whiny goth-chicks" :err:
or
"SIGUR RSS would be a lot more enjoyable if they showed some proverbial balls" :devil:
 
Omng, Proof That There Just Rip Offs!1!::

I Worked Out That The Averege Song Length On This Album Is 11 Minuytes 12 Seconds!!!!

This Is Only 2 Seconds Away From Beingthe Same Length As The Opeth Song Wreath. Coincidence? Ji Don't Think So!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
That's a good review. Better than other CotE reviews I've read which tend to be overly flowery for some reason.