The greatest review of all time!

[The Apparition]

http://www.metalrage.com/reviews/1446

This guy is the single greatest metal reviewer of all time!
Not only does he refer to the album as "The LOST Horizon", he compares us to Tool and also talks about the bad keyboard sound in a song that doesn't even have keyboards! What a champion.

 

[Stormster]

And my god, the intro of ‘Twilight’ sounds like a beginning guitar player, practicing a loop his teacher has come up with in half a minute.

I like the intro!!!!! Just makes the rest of the song seem more kickarse! Especially when it gets faster.

 

[Ebony~Veiled]

what an imbecile.. that review doesn.t make any sense. somebody should tell him where to go...

 

[Keeper of the Seven Cheese]

LOL. I lol'd

I really like the intro phrashing of Twilight's clean guitars.

Maybe Mike's accents are too conflicting for his KSE screams.

 

[petrucci_dude]

That guy probably hasn't heard anything in 13/8 before, hence why he thinks Twilight is played by a beginner. (The intro is in 13/8 and 14/8, lol)

 

[Celestial-Todd]

I doubt he's heard anything other then 4/4

 

[petrucci_dude]

Yeah. He isn't good enough for us 1337 peeps in Prog/Power bands

lol

 

[The Apparition]

Yeah. He isn't good enough for us 1337 peeps in Prog/Power bands

lol

??? p I don't understand your prog nerd dialect. Please translate Scottles.

 

[Suedehead]

??? p I don't understand your prog nerd dialect. Please translate Scottles.

1337 = leet, you stupid asshole.

 

[metal evilution]

It's really Marcus Teske's fault the guitar playing sounds like shit!
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr to german masterer's!!!!

 

[in_absentia]

I really refuse to believe that this guy actually heard the CD.

"with some unfortunate guitar riffs, a bad chosen keyboard sound, a singer who’s struggling to find the right accents and a bad mix between the guitars and the drums. That is, the guitars form almost 80% of the sound whereas the drums are hardly noticeable."

:zombie: come again??? I thought the mix fucking owned! Especially on the guitars!! I bet this guy knows nothing about the mixing desk wtf??

 

[RavenHasFlownAway]

I really refuse to believe that this guy actually heard the CD.

"with some unfortunate guitar riffs, a bad chosen keyboard sound, a singer who’s struggling to find the right accents and a bad mix between the guitars and the drums. That is, the guitars form almost 80% of the sound whereas the drums are hardly noticeable."

:zombie: come again??? I thought the mix fucking owned! Especially on the guitars!! I bet this guy knows nothing about the mixing desk wtf??

Maybe he just has a shit CD player

 

[in_absentia]

Hmm maybe...

 

[RavenHasFlownAway]

http://www.metalrage.com/reviews/1446

This guy is the single greatest metal reviewer of all time!
Not only does he refer to the album as "The LOST Horizon", he compares us to Tool and also talks about the bad keyboard sound in a song that doesn't even have keyboards! What a champion.

"the rest of the cd remains full of ‘things I just don’t understand"

Since hes familiar with Tool's work im sure he doesnt understand what decent music is

What a fuckwitt

 

[Suedehead]

Whilst I am a big Tool fan, it is common knowledge that the average Tool fan engages in bestiality at regular intervals over the course of a day.

 

[petrucci_dude]

C'mon Shane, I thought you would knOw 41l @80uT t3h 1337 sp3ak!!

 

[Pethical]

lol!
He also gave the new Killswitch Engage album and the last 2 Korn albums 90%.
He has air bubbles in his blood stream.

epic burn

 

[Aussie_Metalchild]

Whilst I am a big Tool fan, it is common knowledge that the average Tool fan engages in bestiality at regular intervals over the course of a day.

 

[Goreripper]

Ordinarily I'd say that you guys are just cranky you got owned by a reviewer . But that guy isn't a critic's pen-holder.

That "air bubbles in the bloodstream" line was gold! I wish I'd come up with that one.

BTW guys, I still haven't got a copy of the album! Can I get one without having to come down out of my cave?

 

[The Apparition]

Ordinarily I'd say that you guys are just cranky you got owned by a reviewer . But that guy isn't a critic's pen-holder.

That "air bubbles in the bloodstream" line was gold! I wish I'd come up with that one.

BTW guys, I still haven't got a copy of the album! Can I get one without having to come down out of my cave?

Haha! I really wouldn't care about a negative review as long as it's constructive and the reviewer actually paid enough attention to get the title right!

I'll send you a cd asap mate.