Another good one, vaguely metal-related one is the Norwegian Nemi which is printed in several newspapers and also available on teh Internet. Here, I've even gone and translated a few.
- Good concert last night?
- I need a CD for my daughter's birthday...
- Alice Cooper!?
- NO! I don't want to buy SATANIST MUSIC for her!
- But he's a CHRISTIAN! Etc.
- No, my daughter likes pop. I want "Let me grow up to be an anorectic slut and fuck you in 500 different ways every day, yeah!" by Christina Aguiliera.
- You got fired from the record store on your first day?
- Yeah, apparently you weren't allowed to punch the customers.
- I didn't know what I'd buy for the baby, so I got a teddy bear.
- It's cute!
- Have you brought anything?
- "Soulside Journey" by Darkthrone.
- You've bought a BLACK METAL record for a 2 day-old baby?
- Yeah, it's a big favour.
- When he gets asked the standard question "what was your first record" in the future, he won't have to answer Phil Collins.
- Heh, you could lie.
- But
I know it, and it hurts my heart every day.
[Shortly after the flying head incident on a Mayhem concert]
- Fenriz says, "Darkthrone will play live when pigs fly."
- Hey, pigs CAN fly; I've seen it on a Mayhem concert.