It's just too good to keep it all to myself
Enjoy!
WHY AMERICANS SHOULD NEVER BE ALLOWED TO TRAVEL
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents
* I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get
messed up by being near the window.
* A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the
middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map
and Florida is a very thin state."
* Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I
pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay-over in Dallas.
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas
was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."
* A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that
her flight from Detroit left at 820am and got into Chicago at 833am. I tried
to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not
understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went
very fast, and she bought that!
* A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on
your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do
you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they
put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any
connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into
it" ( I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code
for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on
her luggage.
* "A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those
computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter
plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."
* A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed
in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many
times and never had to have one of those."I double checked and sure
enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
* A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to
Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the
agent "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do
you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back
with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country
and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere. The customer retorted, "Oh don't
be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a
map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do
you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"