and another thing

goatschool

goatschool

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Sep 12, 2002
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i don't think the local suburban libraries are too receptive to a dishevelled asshole wearing a shirt with a goat skull and star of david disguised as a pentagram checking out their literature, or even on their turf.

what was interesting was the totally decked out cabinet display of progressive lit chomsky type alt.indie book/pamphlets under the umbrella theme of "FREE SPEECH IS IMPORTANT!", complete with a picture of george w bush jr and "THE FOURTH REICH??!" scrawled in sharpie over his hairpiece.

two mangy looking 14 year olds totally wanted to kick my ass, and the library clerk didn't even bother to mention my late fees until i brought it up! i was being shooed out! my rights, abused! i hate libraries!
 
i hope you realise that all libraries are connected, and right now i'm checking out reams of paedophiliac and Nazi literature under your name, which will trigger the latest Library Alert System notification sent to the DoJ, meaning you should expect a visit from uniformed men pretty shortly.

also, since they won't find the books at your house, you'll be billed $105/book. unless you scour kiddie porn/nazi bookstores and replace them all yourself for only slightly less the cost. i recommend buying the replacements quickly, before the agents arrive!
 
you think the liberry has my real name?

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a library informant--let's call him octoqueer--let slip some important information.

you better not screw up again, goatschool--i'll be all over you like a pitbull on a poodle.

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if you read the first post in itself, without reading the rest, and just sit there at the end of it... it's the VERY beginning of an epic L.F. Celine novel. i mean, it's really beautiful.
 
i don't know what it is with 14 year olds either, but i guess because i'm their height they have to do the staredown thing, and being a napoleonic and anchorless 31 year old, i can't relinquish eye contact or supress a smirk. someday this will spell trouble.

these kids looked internetty but they might have won. one was bigger and fatty. i think i could have broken an arm and other things, though.
 
there's a tape recording i haven't heard yet but have heard OF many times

which features my co-worker's (40ish) friend calling the police station from a pay phone, saying something like:

"Hi, uh, I don't know quite what to report, but there's a group of...um...children that have been following me and calling me names for quite some time now, and they're starting to look a little rowdy and--OW!--they're throwing rocks! What? No, they must be eleven or twelve years--OW! Help! Help!"

he got jumped on and queerbeat by a pack of like ten pre-adolescents and ended up in the hospital. sad, but also kind of humorous!
 
I feel really strange beating up on 12-year olds. even if I had to do it to defend myself, it just doesn't seem right. Though I am tempted. Often.

ps, my mom's a librarian.
 
libraries are the singular most wonderful thing in the world.

although...my private Bexley library is very elitist.

Me: you don't seem to have a book I'm looking for...
Ref. Librarian: (peering down her patrician nose at me) well...
Me: Can I get this book through the Columbus library system on an interlibrary loan?
Ref. Librarian: *sniff* We prefer not to do loans with the columbus system...
 
the interlibrary loan system is actually really complex with politics...each library has to allocate a certain amount of its budget to pay each year to be a part of the system, and, in the case of big libraries, hire a position ($30-40k/year) to handle ILLs.

of course, a lot of years libraries fall short of their budgets, so they don't pay. so the other libraries have to pick up the slack. when patrons want to engage in ILL with a non-subscribing library, sometimes the library who actually paid will nevertheless help you out, but sometimes libraries will take advantage of this and only pay their fees every third year or so to leech off the other libraries.

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details, josh?

this is really strange - in the past 2 weeks, 2 kids and their MOM asked me to buy them tickets to see an R rated film (i turned them down!), and at the train station on sunday some girl asked me to buy her cigarettes...
 
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