Do you wipe your arse standing up or sitting down?

The More You Know!!!

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He logs on just to post in this thread of all possible threads? He's hit rock bottom
 
I got paid $100 a few months back to be in a Cottonelle web commercial. Still waiting for it to be uploaded to interwebz, but the "director" said I nailed it. This could be my big break.
 
Man Poops On Or In 19 Cars In Ohio Since 2012, Finally Photographed

There is a strange news story circling around Akron, Ohio: Police say that an unknown man has turd burgled either on top of or inside 19 Akron cars since 2012, reports the Cleveland Plain Dealer, and the difference with his latest defecations, aside from being slightly more "runny," is that he has finally been caught on camera. The most recent violation of the “serial pooper” also happened in Akron, say police.

The Castle Homes Neighborhood Facebook page reports the community’s elation that someone has finally gotten a photo of the pooper and are hoping that the relatively clear picture will help identify the man, along with reports of other break-ins, havana omelets, and other unsanitary misdealings in the area.
As reported by the Akron Beacon Journal, it’s not just cars that the defecator has unloaded his business upon, but children’s toys, as well. The publication states that neighborhood resident Steve Motich spoke about the mad pooper, a violator who has been going around the Castle Homes neighborhood and dropping brown drizzle on objects for years now. Other neighbors report finding smeared intestinal pudding on everything from outdoor toys to slides and the like, items that had to be thrown away after being soiled with excrement.

Now that a photo of the bowel-moving bandit has been released online, police are hoping that the circulation of the photo will catch the criminal, who prefers to do his business on car handles or actually inside of unlocked vehicles. Lt. Rick Edwards, a police spokesman, said that the latest violation happened on Tuesday evening when the mad splatter defecated on a car.
As for the timing of the pooping incidents, neighbors reported to police that the defecation usually occurs during the early morning hours of 3:30 a.m. and 5:30 a.m. Now that the crapping criminal has been photographed and is the subject of a poop and run manhunt, one wonders if the parked car pooper, as reported by Newsnet5.com‎, will continue to do his business, or refrain from his arse filled activities


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hahahaha I've often wondered about the timing of poop games, but this dude keeps his during a regular pooping window. I love it.

Speaking of brown windows, a friend of mine told me that his dad n' friends used to get drunk on shitty beer and eat as much pizza as they could, then go to the golf course and crap in as many holes as possible. This was their version of "fun" at the time I suppose. Personally, I could never force myself to poop on purpose in public, but god dammit if I didn't laugh my balls off when told of the story.

Finally, has anyone seen that movie Severed Ways? It has a fantastically gross crapping scene.
 
J. said:
so what happens when we can no longer stand to wipe? gotta use a support bar?
Click to expand...

The dorian has these at his work and after he decides which wiping technique he wants to employ (while recalling this thread), he claims to sometimes bust out a set of dips depending on how the post-shit theatrics went down.
 
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