**Decibel
Decibel Magazine
Some of my Decibel colleagues, who follow teams from such exotic locations as Dallas, Seattle, and New York, were also tortured and teased in manner that was, well, downright Philadelphian. But even if we still can't all agree on which petulant, overpaid athletes to invest our pathetic hopes and dreams in, at least we all see eye to eye on the soundtrack to our commiseration. Unlike Decibel's two previous Albums of the Year lists, this year's champion dominated like Bush in a predominantly black Florida county-minus all the rampant ballot tampering, of course. But before you flip the page to view the final results and begin your "How the fuck didn't _____ make the list?" letters, here are 20 more important postseason awards below that Decibel was compelled to bestow.
False Metal Album of the Year: Danava, Danava
Tr00 Metal Album of the Year: Iron Maiden, A Matter of Life and Death
Five-Tool Prospect of the Year: Baroness
Lifetime Achievement Award: Enslaved
Isis Rip-Off Band of the Year: Tool
Most Unexpected "Hipster Metal" Article Fallout of Year: NPR interviews
Most Garish Extreme Artist MySpace Profile of the Year: Trey Azagthoth
Comeback of the Year Award: Celtic Frost
Don't Come Back Next Year Award: Rob Zombie
"Four Letters Say It All" Song Title of the Year: "Gunt," Made Out of Babies
Pelican Memorial "No, Seriously, Stop Talking" Award: Peter Dolving, the Haunted
Unapologetic Pantera Worship of the Year: Lamb of God, "Redneck"
Reissue of the Year: (tie) Only Living Witness, Prone Mortal Form/Innocents and Beherit, The Oath of Black Blood
"OK, That Happened" Album of the Year: Jeff Walker und Die Fluffers, Welcome to Carcass Cuntry
Pointless Covers Album of the Year: (tie) The Dillinger Escape Plan, Plagiarism and Between the Buried and Me, The Anatomy of
Projected Most Pointless Release of 2007: Isis, Panopticon Remixes 4CD-boxset
Most Unwelcome Yet Predictable Breakup of the Year: the Darkness
Comedy Album of the Year: Khlyst, Chaos Is My Name
Catchphrase We're Psyched to Be Associated With: (tie) "invisible oranges" and "good cop/bad cop"
Catchphrase We're Not So Psyched to Be Associated With: "nigel hipsters"
Now, on to the Top 40 list…
Decibel Magazine
Some of my Decibel colleagues, who follow teams from such exotic locations as Dallas, Seattle, and New York, were also tortured and teased in manner that was, well, downright Philadelphian. But even if we still can't all agree on which petulant, overpaid athletes to invest our pathetic hopes and dreams in, at least we all see eye to eye on the soundtrack to our commiseration. Unlike Decibel's two previous Albums of the Year lists, this year's champion dominated like Bush in a predominantly black Florida county-minus all the rampant ballot tampering, of course. But before you flip the page to view the final results and begin your "How the fuck didn't _____ make the list?" letters, here are 20 more important postseason awards below that Decibel was compelled to bestow.
False Metal Album of the Year: Danava, Danava
Tr00 Metal Album of the Year: Iron Maiden, A Matter of Life and Death
Five-Tool Prospect of the Year: Baroness
Lifetime Achievement Award: Enslaved
Isis Rip-Off Band of the Year: Tool
Most Unexpected "Hipster Metal" Article Fallout of Year: NPR interviews
Most Garish Extreme Artist MySpace Profile of the Year: Trey Azagthoth
Comeback of the Year Award: Celtic Frost
Don't Come Back Next Year Award: Rob Zombie
"Four Letters Say It All" Song Title of the Year: "Gunt," Made Out of Babies
Pelican Memorial "No, Seriously, Stop Talking" Award: Peter Dolving, the Haunted
Unapologetic Pantera Worship of the Year: Lamb of God, "Redneck"
Reissue of the Year: (tie) Only Living Witness, Prone Mortal Form/Innocents and Beherit, The Oath of Black Blood
"OK, That Happened" Album of the Year: Jeff Walker und Die Fluffers, Welcome to Carcass Cuntry
Pointless Covers Album of the Year: (tie) The Dillinger Escape Plan, Plagiarism and Between the Buried and Me, The Anatomy of
Projected Most Pointless Release of 2007: Isis, Panopticon Remixes 4CD-boxset
Most Unwelcome Yet Predictable Breakup of the Year: the Darkness
Comedy Album of the Year: Khlyst, Chaos Is My Name
Catchphrase We're Psyched to Be Associated With: (tie) "invisible oranges" and "good cop/bad cop"
Catchphrase We're Not So Psyched to Be Associated With: "nigel hipsters"
Now, on to the Top 40 list…
