Just a clarification

[kleo706]

I have been hideously wronged, like the good Princess Diana by the windshield she passed through in her final moments. My fellow English-persons brand me as a "wellie spy" and worse yet a war-mongering American. I feel you well-intentioned gents have let your love of this forum blind you to the obvious truths of my typing. Can you not see the tea stains and scone crumbs in every post I make? Have I even once spelled "colour" in the form shortened by a culture too obese to reach the "u"? No, my cousins under the crown; I have not nor shall I ever be American!

Your confusion is understandable though. It is the result of your forgetting my introduction as Ian the BANKER. You see, I let usage of this account per hour. Given current exchange rates, I am averaging .000000000075 quid a post; a small blow against the Americans but a blow nonetheless.
We shall fight the Wellies on the beaches, on the seas, on the land, in the sky, at the Tesco! Notice I say "we"; my cohorts of non-American origin for my name is IAN and I AM BIRMINGHAMIAN! God save the Queen!

xoxoxo
-I-

 

[Oded]

Damned Brum!
You just can't resist taking those subtle and underhanded shots at Americans, can you?
I'd advise you to lay your age-old stereotypes, cliches, and generalizations (sorry, 'generalisations') of Americans to rest.
The notion of Americans as obese, ill-cultured, un-educated, clueless, abrasive louts--- true. In some cases, mind you- NOT accurate in MILLIONS of others...
The ironic thing is that Americans are uniformly condemned, and yet the piss-headed primitives I've seen in various parts of England put any American to shame in this regard! Hull is every bit as dead-headed as Mobile, Alabama, in other words... and the accent's just as annoying.

'War-mongering Americans'? I'm against this potentially world-ending conflict. Don't lump me in with that lasso-spinning gimp G.W. and his be-Stetsoned cronies. If you turn on the news, you'll see that millions of my countrymen- many of them addle-brained hippies, admittedly- share my view.

I don't have 2.5 children, I don't drive a station wagon, I'm not a Bible-thumping Christian, I don't speak in a boorish manner, I don't shop at malls, I realize that American beer is, in fact, weak piss, I don't make a fool out of myself as a finger-pointing and camera-toting tourist in countries not my own, I'm not politically apathetic, I can point out London, Tokyo, and New York on a map, I hate fast food and Coke, I'm literate, etc., etc., etc., et-fucking-cetera...

 

[Prostheta]

I'm actually from Hull myself. Yes, the accent is probably annoying but whatever (oops....Americanisms....).

[insert token America bashing here]

[insert token apologies for the non-stereotypical Americans here]

[insert justifications here]

I can't be fucked to go over all this shit. Go out your house and have a good time. Drink beer (piss weak US beer of course ) and be metal. Stop sitting in front on your monitor.

Bloody Internet.

- Carl/Prostheta -
webmaster: http://www.strappingyounglad.com

 

[Bambi]

of course if you were a brit you'd know that the american spelling of color probably predates the british spelling as the language used in the colonies did not develop while the british version did, it is essentially a throw back to 17th century english. either way you smell like a fukking yankee you barclays banker

 

[Prostheta]

But still, Americans suck anyway. I can't be bothered to explain, do a Google search on how America sucks. A lot more people can say it better than I can.

Oh fuck it, everyone sucks.:Shedevil:

 

[Oded]

You're right. America DOES suck. But not all of us in it suck- that was my point. It's not worth arguing about, you're right again...
but you're a damned hypocrite if you hate the Yanks, and yet are employed by a band featuring the very American Gene Hoglan!
and at once

 

[Prostheta]

Oh yeah /forum/images/smilies/supergrin.gif
Gene rocks man - this balances things out somewhat.

- Carl/Prostheta -
webmaster: http://www.strappingyounglad.com

 

[kleo706]

of course if you were a brit you'd know that the american spelling of color probably predates the british spelling as the language used in the colonies did not develop while the british version did, it is essentially a throw back to 17th century english. either way you smell like a fukking yankee you barclays banker

I was aware. However, I failed to see how that was relevant. I was stating that Americans are too fat and lazy to type out "colour". They were made aware of the changeand got our letters. However, even then... their fingers were far too pudgy and caked in grease to open the envelopes. That has been a tradition for those lousy heathen, glutton, punks since the early days when we kicked them out of our governmental system.

xoxoxo
-I-