Metal Intro - Thoughts?

[karp47]

I just finished recording a band, we had intended to lay an intro down but ran out of time, so they asked me to write an intro for them.

Let me know what you think, pretty much open to all criticism, even if you think it's shit.

 

[IDontWantMyUsername]

You have a very nice starting point thinking of the atmosphere and chords, but I would add some melodic material in the heavy part to not get the listener bored.

 

[DestroyAndDominate]

It is decent. However, I think the melody itself requires more depth. Perhaps, it simply needs heavier bass or drums.