Ode To The Cheesburger

SharkBlack

SharkBlack

Member
Jul 13, 2005
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San Jose, Ca
I've always thought that I had a love affair with those cheesy, juicy, saucey, produce laden wonders on a bun! I love cheeseburgers! I love bacon cheese burgers, mushroom burgers, guacamole burgers, chili burgers, pastrami burgers, even hamburgers with hotdogs on them!! :loco: And I have a gut to proove it.

But I bow down to the man! He found the love of his life and he stuck with it!!

DAMN!!! And he has the receipts to prove it!:lol::lol::lol:

639 Big Macs Per Year For 36 Years!!!

big-mac-11417.jpg
 
That guy is a rookie compared to this:
(LONG video - Scan through it! BIG payoff in the end! :lol:)


[ame]http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5452588123248817471[/ame]
 
Pellaz said:
I must confess, I'm curious to know what kind of shape he's in. That's a whole lotta Big Macs.
Click to expand...

According to another article he's a "fit" guy.

And actually, there's a wikipedia article on him.

In 2003 Don Gorske ate 741 Big Macs, an average of 2.03 Big Macs per day. Despite maintaining what many would consider to be an unhealthy diet, Gorske is 6 feet (1.83 m) tall, 180 pounds (82 kg), and claims a cholesterol level of 140. However, his claimed average daily consumption of two Big Macs amounts to only 1080 calories, according to the nutritional information published by McDonald's[1], although this does not take into account his energy intake from fluids. In comparison, the USDA recommends about 2,200 calories per day.[2] Thus, whilst Gorske consumes mainly calorie-rich food, he maintains a stable weight by eating a lesser volume of food than the average American.
Click to expand...
 
The profiled the guy in the movie, Super Size Me. He's from Wisconsin (no jab to Dub - lol), the Fond du Loc area. He's very tall, thin and I keep joking with my friends that he's "gotta be a RUSH fan". He looks like one (lol). Last I knew his cholesterol was good, he doesn't eat the huge meals, just 1-2 of those a day with a coke and very seldom ever eats the fries.
 
Yeah, this dude was on the radio yesterday.
Johnny B (from the Loop, here in Chicago) called him up at work and was talking to him.
Apparently he has only missed like 8 days or something of his 'routine' due to the fact that there was storm and McDonald's was closed, among other instances where he was deprived of his beloved Big Mac for the day.
Now, he buys them and puts them in the freezer 'in case of emergency'.
But yeah...I figured the guy would have horrible cholestoral, but I guess everyone's body is different.
Still.....don't you think he would get tired of having the same thing to eat everyday?
At least go for a Quarter Pounder or something.
Ha Ha!
 
Hell, a Quarter Pounder and small fries is only 640 calories (granted, what's a QP without the C? Add another 100 for cheese). You can eat "junk," you just can't eat it 5 times a day, every day. And if you're getting plenty of exercise, you can eat basically what you want and still be healthy.

Back to the actual topic... gotta love OCD! :D
 
BIG ASS BURGERS


I take 2 parts ground beef, one part ground turkey, and one part ground pork. Then, I add one or two whole cloves of garlic (Depending on whether I have to speak the rest of the day!) parsley, seasoning salt, paprika, onion powder, diced onions, lotsa flour to make the burger stay together and not break apart, and sometimes Mrs. Dash.

Then I make burger patties about 5/8" to 3/4" thick by using two pieces of wax paper and a wood cutting board as a press to flatten them perfectly, cut with a particular cereal bowl I have to fit these huge kaizer rolls I get at my local bakery, so the bun's about 6" diameter and the patties about 8" diameter. The burgers will shrink to just about the same diameter as the buns. I don't want hockey pucks, and I don't want Burger King paper-thin crap. I wanna burger I can't finish! I wanna burger that doesn't leave room for fries or any other sides!

Then if I have enough friends over, a sheet of aluminum foil folded in half to sizzle a 1/4 pack of bacon. The mushrooms and the cheese go on to the burgers with 2 minutes to go. I want the shrooms trapped by molten cheese, then the bacon gets mashed into the cheese on top.

After that, it's how you want it built.

These suckers are so damned big by the time I'm done with them, I gotta use both hands to mash it all together enough to even fit in my jaws.


Just thought of something.... I've got scrap strips of stainless steel from a project here at work. I'm making me a burger cutter! Screw that cereal bowl!
 
Bryan316 said:
BIG ASS BURGERS


I take 2 parts ground beef, one part ground turkey, and one part ground pork. Then, I add one or two whole cloves of garlic (Depending on whether I have to speak the rest of the day!) parsley, seasoning salt, paprika, onion powder, diced onions, lotsa flour to make the burger stay together and not break apart, and sometimes Mrs. Dash.

Then I make burger patties about 5/8" to 3/4" thick by using two pieces of wax paper and a wood cutting board as a press to flatten them perfectly, cut with a particular cereal bowl I have to fit these huge kaizer rolls I get at my local bakery, so the bun's about 6" diameter and the patties about 8" diameter. The burgers will shrink to just about the same diameter as the buns. I don't want hockey pucks, and I don't want Burger King paper-thin crap. I wanna burger I can't finish! I wanna burger that doesn't leave room for fries or any other sides!

Then if I have enough friends over, a sheet of aluminum foil folded in half to sizzle a 1/4 pack of bacon. The mushrooms and the cheese go on to the burgers with 2 minutes to go. I want the shrooms trapped by molten cheese, then the bacon gets mashed into the cheese on top.

After that, it's how you want it built.

These suckers are so damned big by the time I'm done with them, I gotta use both hands to mash it all together enough to even fit in my jaws.


Just thought of something.... I've got scrap strips of stainless steel from a project here at work. I'm making me a burger cutter! Screw that cereal bowl!
Click to expand...

That's What I'm Talkin' About!!:headbang:
 
Bryan316 said:
BIG ASS BURGERS


I take 2 parts ground beef, one part ground turkey, and one part ground pork. Then, I add one or two whole cloves of garlic (Depending on whether I have to speak the rest of the day!) parsley, seasoning salt, paprika, onion powder, diced onions, lotsa flour to make the burger stay together and not break apart, and sometimes Mrs. Dash.

Then I make burger patties about 5/8" to 3/4" thick by using two pieces of wax paper and a wood cutting board as a press to flatten them perfectly, cut with a particular cereal bowl I have to fit these huge kaizer rolls I get at my local bakery, so the bun's about 6" diameter and the patties about 8" diameter. The burgers will shrink to just about the same diameter as the buns. I don't want hockey pucks, and I don't want Burger King paper-thin crap. I wanna burger I can't finish! I wanna burger that doesn't leave room for fries or any other sides!

Then if I have enough friends over, a sheet of aluminum foil folded in half to sizzle a 1/4 pack of bacon. The mushrooms and the cheese go on to the burgers with 2 minutes to go. I want the shrooms trapped by molten cheese, then the bacon gets mashed into the cheese on top.

After that, it's how you want it built.

These suckers are so damned big by the time I'm done with them, I gotta use both hands to mash it all together enough to even fit in my jaws.


Just thought of something.... I've got scrap strips of stainless steel from a project here at work. I'm making me a burger cutter! Screw that cereal bowl!
Click to expand...

Niiiiiice! :headbang:

--Mike
 
Bryan316 said:
BIG ASS BURGERS


I take 2 parts ground beef, one part ground turkey, and one part ground pork. Then, I add one or two whole cloves of garlic (Depending on whether I have to speak the rest of the day!) parsley, seasoning salt, paprika, onion powder, diced onions, lotsa flour to make the burger stay together and not break apart, and sometimes Mrs. Dash.

Then I make burger patties about 5/8" to 3/4" thick by using two pieces of wax paper and a wood cutting board as a press to flatten them perfectly, cut with a particular cereal bowl I have to fit these huge kaizer rolls I get at my local bakery, so the bun's about 6" diameter and the patties about 8" diameter. The burgers will shrink to just about the same diameter as the buns. I don't want hockey pucks, and I don't want Burger King paper-thin crap. I wanna burger I can't finish! I wanna burger that doesn't leave room for fries or any other sides!

Then if I have enough friends over, a sheet of aluminum foil folded in half to sizzle a 1/4 pack of bacon. The mushrooms and the cheese go on to the burgers with 2 minutes to go. I want the shrooms trapped by molten cheese, then the bacon gets mashed into the cheese on top.

After that, it's how you want it built.

These suckers are so damned big by the time I'm done with them, I gotta use both hands to mash it all together enough to even fit in my jaws.


Just thought of something.... I've got scrap strips of stainless steel from a project here at work. I'm making me a burger cutter! Screw that cereal bowl!
Click to expand...

nomnomnom - Reverend Su can has cheeseburger?!?! i know what i'm havin for dinner now :)
:worship:
 
Bryan316 said:
BIG ASS BURGERS


I take 2 parts ground beef, one part ground turkey, and one part ground pork. Then, I add one or two whole cloves of garlic (Depending on whether I have to speak the rest of the day!) parsley, seasoning salt, paprika, onion powder, diced onions, lotsa flour to make the burger stay together and not break apart, and sometimes Mrs. Dash.

Then I make burger patties about 5/8" to 3/4" thick by using two pieces of wax paper and a wood cutting board as a press to flatten them perfectly, cut with a particular cereal bowl I have to fit these huge kaizer rolls I get at my local bakery, so the bun's about 6" diameter and the patties about 8" diameter. The burgers will shrink to just about the same diameter as the buns. I don't want hockey pucks, and I don't want Burger King paper-thin crap. I wanna burger I can't finish! I wanna burger that doesn't leave room for fries or any other sides!

Then if I have enough friends over, a sheet of aluminum foil folded in half to sizzle a 1/4 pack of bacon. The mushrooms and the cheese go on to the burgers with 2 minutes to go. I want the shrooms trapped by molten cheese, then the bacon gets mashed into the cheese on top.

After that, it's how you want it built.

These suckers are so damned big by the time I'm done with them, I gotta use both hands to mash it all together enough to even fit in my jaws.


Just thought of something.... I've got scrap strips of stainless steel from a project here at work. I'm making me a burger cutter! Screw that cereal bowl!
Click to expand...

Sounds pretty good, but I prefer to make mine with the cheese in the middle, preferably getting some really good Bleu Cheese, then you halve the patty, make a reservoire for the cheese and then put the other half on top and crimp the edges together. Some cheese will probably ooze out (that's how you know you made it right) but if you make sure to spend a second forming the burger properly, the majority will stay inside. Also, fuck flour. it keeps it together, but it also makes the meat drier than it needs to be. Add some stuff to make that fucker moist. In addition to the onions and garlic and such that you mentioned, I like using a dash of soy sauce in lieu of any salts, a bit of Worcestershire sauce and some ketchup (kind of like making meat loaf, but ti's a burger). If you form them right (and they will look like mutants, the way God intended), they won't fall apart. You also can't be flipping those fuckers 5 times. Let it cook, be patient. Some of the juiciest burgers imaginable. Also, you can add some tiny slices of bacon (not bacon bits from the can, some real fuckin' raw bacon) into the burger and it'll cook up awesome and give it more bacon flavor. Then add some bacon and grilled onions to the top and you're golden.

These don't cook up fast either. Be patient for the best burger that isn't raw, doesn't fall apart, and has delicious melted cheese in the middle. Great call on the kaiser rolls too. Hamburger buns are fucking weak. Also, to change it up, i recommend making the burgers with a ratio of 2 parts ground venison, 2 parts ground elk, one part ground chuck. You can even use slightly less beef, but there just needs to be a bit of fat in it or else your burgers WILL fall apart.
 
Oh, before i forget, the other option if you want a good-ass spicy burger is to follow the above instructions, but add some finely diced jalapenos (or other peppers depending on your taste for spice), use hot sauce (i prefer Valentina extra spicy or some kind of Habanero sauce), and some red pepper flakes into the burger itself. Don't be shy, this is supposed to be spicy! Also, add any other mexican seasonings you see fit, throw some jalapeno slices on top of that burger, and if you want to put some ketchup on that sumnabitch, mix it with some hot sauce and get some dank spicy ketchup. Don't be a pussy. Do it right
 
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