Oedipus: The greatest essay you'll ever read... ever.

[Kronikle66]

I actually know the guy who wrote this, and I'm told that he was high when he wrote it and he actually turned this thing in. Knowing him I believe it. What you see is an actual graded paper. Apperrently the reason it passed was that attendance counted (in a college course ).

Here are some other various ones:

 

[-Gavin-]

That is officially the funniest shit ever!

 

[Hylian]

Oh my fucking god.... This shit is fucking hilarious!

'Dr. Dre produced, "The Chronic" because the Bible tells you to smoke lots of pot, and Oedipus used to blaze with the makers of Aqua Fresh tooth paste.'

'The greeks invented anal lube.'

'El Niño is spanish. It is the spanish word for child. Like all things spanish, it is dangerous.' <-- I agree with that =P

'I chose Walt Whitman for my biography report because Mr. Farlow said that if I wasn't going to take this class seriously and pick a real poet I might as well not come to class anymore. Walt Whitman was an awful child molester who was born in ancient Hong Kong.'

 

[Rose Immortal]

'El Niño is spanish. It is the spanish word for child. Like all things spanish, it is dangerous.' <-- I agree with that =P

Hmmm...I wonder what the Spanish-speakers on the board might say to you?

You know, I imagine that first essay also passed because as much as that teacher must've hated this kid not taking his course seriously, he HAD to have found it funny. Otherwise, why would he have actually graded the entire paper?

 

[-Gavin-]

Dunno but if they get pissed off they're only fulfilling the stereotype

 

[Hylian]

Dunno but if they get pissed off they're only fulfilling the stereotype

Damn right man!

Well, not sure if they'll complain. I mean, AT LEAST they're not american. =P

 

[soundgarden]

OMFG, that is the funniest thing I ever read

The lightning bolt paper is the best.

"You die when you are struck by lightning, and your tree is knocked down"

Thanks for the good laugh

 

[Beelzebub]

Those comments on the papers don't really look too teacher-like. But amusing nonetheless

 

[-Gavin-]

They are exactly the type of comments you get on papers in my schools

 

[Beelzebub]

I meant with respect to their handwriting.

 

[-Gavin-]

Again, seen worse from teachers

 

[Demonspell]

LMAO...especially at "she aborted a kitten..." in the Oedipus paper and the Livejorunal reference in the Walt Whitman essay...

 

[Rose Immortal]

Damn right man!

Well, not sure if they'll complain. I mean, AT LEAST they're not american. =P

You'd be surprised how many Spanish speakers we have here. I'm one of them.

 

[frozen_core]

holy fucking shit!

Walt Whitman died a lonely man in Walt Disney Land. He was on the gondola ride, and he fell out because he wasn't fastened properly to the restraint. Thanks to his dumb ass, now none of us can ride it anymore. Thanks a lot Walt Whitman.

he was not only our saviour, but a heroic Time Traveller from the future. Jesus came from a bleak and dismal future ruled by dragons and gigantic whores on the backs of animals (Revelations)

You have stumbled upon the greatest stuff on the Internet. The Internet can now close for good...except for this site...and symphonyx.com...and others...so, please, Internet, do not close.

 

[Beelzebub]

You'd be surprised how many Spanish speakers we have here. I'm one of them.

¿Verdad? I took Spanish for 6 years and yet I can't speak it fluently. Got a 4 on the AP exam by some unholy miracle and yet all I remember now are the swear words. I remember somehow managing to incorporate "la puta" (whore/slut/bitch/prostitute/etc.) into one of my essays and getting away with it.

I would give Jimmy points for creativity.

 

[Rose Immortal]

I still get really nervous speaking, but if it weren't for that I would probably speak fluently. As it is, at least I can read and write it, and understand the spoken language well in most cases.

I do think the AP exam grades easy, though, because I made a real mess of the taped part and got a 4 as well. But that was awhile back.

 

[Beelzebub]

I do think the AP exam grades easy, though, because I made a real mess of the taped part and got a 4 as well. But that was awhile back.

I remember fucking up part of my taped portion of the exam and going "scheisse!" while record was still on.

 

[Hylian]

You'd be surprised how many Spanish speakers we have here. I'm one of them.

Just what the fuck do spanish speakers have to do with this? =P

 

[Androz]

You'd be surprised how many Spanish speakers we have here. I'm one of them.

I'm one of them too

 

[Rose Immortal]

I remember fucking up part of my taped portion of the exam and going "scheisse!" while record was still on.

Shoulda said "mierda" instead.