[Phone Rings]
[Jack-O:]
"Complex Litigation, this is John"
[Theocracy:]
Johnny's worried 'bout the Yanks again
Pushing an eleven on a scale of one to ten
Legal mind and staunch Republican
His love for A-Rod wavers like a candle in the wind
He still misses the Mighty Whale
And wonders why the Yankees failed
To get Johan Santana when they had the perfect chance
A bastion of legal knowledge
Cries 'cause his beloved college, Holy Cross,
Stunk up the joint and didn't make the Dance
Oh, you had us at hello, Jack-O
The man, the myth, the legend
The Gregarious Raconteur
Oh, Babe Ruth to Joe DiMaggio,
The greatest Yank of all is the Gregarious Raconteur
Enemies of Boston sports, arise
Fall behind your leader, litigate and terrorize
Jack-O and Hank Steinbrenner, your guides
Johnny's on a mission, you can see it in his eyes
Clemens is his favorite villain
Mike Wallace and penicillin
'04 ALCS is his painful albatross
C.T. throwing down the gauntlet
Johnny's mad and likes to flaunt it
But if he comes to Charlestown, C.T. might pepper his sauce
Oh, you had us at hello, Jack-O
The man, the myth, the legend
The Gregarious Raconteur
Oh, Babe Ruth to Joe DiMaggio,
The greatest Yank of all is the Gregarious Raconteur
Oh, you had us at hello, Jack-O
The man, the legend, Gregarious Raconteur
Oh, Babe Ruth to Joe DiMaggio,
The greatest Yank of all is the Gregarious Raconteur, ahh!
[Bill Simmons] "Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny."
