Anyone read The Onion and think its the best thing ever? I thought it would be fun if we all tried to come up with our own onion-esque news articles about music or whatever.
For those who don't know about The Onion, check out http://www.theonion.com
Here is my feeble attempt:
"Metal front men now 50% more incoherrent at live shows."
According to a research study conducted by the Music Department at the University of Maryland, College Park, incoherrence amongst metal singers has increased 50% since last year. This is marks the largest single year increase in incoherrence since 1994.
According to local metal scence-ster David "dune_666" Fladung, metal front men have rapidly declined in their abilities to hype up the crowd. "I think the low point was when I heard the singer of The Chasm say 'Fuck yeah or what'", says Fladung, who went on to exclaim "that doesn't even fucking make sense."
The study points out that this increase in incoherrence can be traced to unusual uses of the word "fuck" in monologues by these singers. Apparently "fuck" serves as a noun, verb, adverb, adjective, and preposition, in the lyrics and commentary performed by metal singers at live shows.
For those who don't know about The Onion, check out http://www.theonion.com
Here is my feeble attempt:
"Metal front men now 50% more incoherrent at live shows."
According to a research study conducted by the Music Department at the University of Maryland, College Park, incoherrence amongst metal singers has increased 50% since last year. This is marks the largest single year increase in incoherrence since 1994.
According to local metal scence-ster David "dune_666" Fladung, metal front men have rapidly declined in their abilities to hype up the crowd. "I think the low point was when I heard the singer of The Chasm say 'Fuck yeah or what'", says Fladung, who went on to exclaim "that doesn't even fucking make sense."
The study points out that this increase in incoherrence can be traced to unusual uses of the word "fuck" in monologues by these singers. Apparently "fuck" serves as a noun, verb, adverb, adjective, and preposition, in the lyrics and commentary performed by metal singers at live shows.
