Umbrellas up the cock

[Wolff]

Afternoon tits.

I'm doing the honours of being best man for one of my mates, so I need to do a bit of research re stitching him with the speech.

As luck would have it I happen to know that he had that evil sounding test for the STD - can't remember its name? It makes bird sterile - that involved an umbrella shaped instrument being rammed in a place that it certainly shouldn't, opened, and then dragged out.

Anyone know the medical name for this torture device?

 

[Sadistik]

that's harsh bringing that up ina speech!

 

[Wolff]

He is a crazy fucker. He deserves it

True story this: He came back from Rome after working there for a few month's and it was cos of the dredded pox that he had to return.

He went to the doctor and they sent him round to the clinic. The nurse asked him to get his dick out and then proceeded to stick what he described as a 'Long needle with a cotton swab on the end', down the eye of his already painful cock.

What a relief he said it was when she pulled it out, he was close to tears.



Then the Nurse said "Well done Mr Phillips, only two to go"

 

[CarcassKreator]

He went to the doctor and they sent him round to the clinic. The nurse asked him to get his dick out and then proceeded to stick what he described as a 'Long needle with a cotton swab on the end', down the eye of his already painful cock.

Oh my God!!! I feel the pain myself after reading this

 

[Scytheman]

Oh crap that shit sounds painful! My lil' bro had a chlamydia test that went like that, but he said it didn't hurt much. It turned out he didn't have chlamydia though so perhaps that's why it didn't hurt too bad

 

[Manbient]

ah fuck man i feel his pain! I broke my back 6 weeks ago (still recovering...) and for the 2 weeks i was in the hospital i had to have a catheter. Well what that is is this little fucking tube that they stick up your cock hole all the way up to your bladder so you don't have to push to pee, it just comes out. Anyway it was THE WORST pain i have ever had down there... It was so bad because i had this like 65 year old nurse do it and she had to hold my cock and ram the thing in there and she kept fucking up and getting it stuck on something halfway in and she had to pull it out twice and try again... man it felt like it was cutting up the inside walls of my urethra to shreds!!! And it was worse cause this gross old lady was fondling me! She eventually had to call this guy over and he had to do it... man it was painful... And that wasn't the end of it either, the whole time it was in there, if i even moved a tiny bit (which was all i could do anyway) the think would hurt so bad in there. And when they took it out, it ALSO hurt SOO BAD!!! Like cutting it up again... and then i couldn't pee for a day after. It burned and hurt for a few days after, and it was so weird... when they took it out, I felt like i had to pee, but pushing did ABSOLUTELY nothing! then they said "if you don't urinate in 6 hours we have to put this thing back in" fuck man that was it... i tried for 3 hours strait to pee and it hurt my back to strain, but there was NO FUCKING way i was gonna let them put that thing back in... man that was the most violated i've ever felt...

 

[Demonspell]

Am I a sadist because I laughed hard at the title of this thread?

 

[TrevJ]

*Gets out notepad*
Note to self: never break back.


But seriously, damn! That sounds really shatty... I'd never let any sharp or pointy objects near my regions. You're a braver man than I

 

[Wolff]

Anyway... back to the fucken thread kidos:

Anyone know the medical name for this torture device? And no... it's not called Jannet.