On my trip down to New York for New Year's, I had the misfortune of sharing the bus with a pack (six) of youths (twentyish) who had been drinking and were largely illiterate. Since they couldn't read, they occupied themselves by talking loudly to each other and to a girl and her boyfriend sitting across the aisle (directly in front of me). For four hours. Preventing me from sleeping or concentrating on reading.
They seemed like your regular white-hat Massachusetts assholes. The worst of them was a lisping kid who looked kind of like a punched-in-the-face Elliott Smith. They spent about two hours telling each other really loud, stupid, dirty jokes (if I had a kid on the bus, I would've socked them) and the other two hour bragging about their achievements.
Idiott Smith used lots of pseudo-ghetto lingo like "dog", but he didn't even attempt a fake ghetto accent, instead just lisping it in his white fratboy accent. He bragged about being licensed to carry handguns and how he would go hunting and shoot anyone who fucked with him. He also said he was 23, lived at home, and his parents would "kill him" if they knew he was on his way to NYC. They were talking about going to a party in NYC at a friend's house and were like "Shit, I'm nto staying in no (with disgust) guest bedroom. If they offer me the mutherfucking guest bedroom I'm goin' straight to a hotel, dog. None of that shit for me." and tons of other arrogant posturing that certainly wasn't true.
He was also the worst joke-teller in the world. He told two fifteen-minute jokes, full of (really bad) voices, such as a generic "retarded guy" who kept repeating the same stuff over and over, and nobody laughed when he was done. He fucked up about five jokes, telling the punchline first or messing it up entirely. The girlfriend and boyfriend were subtly making fun of him the whole time (the girl calling him a "loser" and then saying he was joking when he talked about getting in trouble with his parents) and at one point she asked him if he ever "fooled around" with one of his bus friends. He got really offended and started yelling about how he wasn't no fag and so on and so forth.
Anyway, the height of the night came when he was bragging about some stupid achievement or another and was like, "And my parents are both Albanian. That's right, I'm Albanian, straight up, dog."
I immediately thought of Azal and was like, "I now understand why he hates Albanians."
So I am with you now, Azal. Death to Albanians.
They seemed like your regular white-hat Massachusetts assholes. The worst of them was a lisping kid who looked kind of like a punched-in-the-face Elliott Smith. They spent about two hours telling each other really loud, stupid, dirty jokes (if I had a kid on the bus, I would've socked them) and the other two hour bragging about their achievements.
Idiott Smith used lots of pseudo-ghetto lingo like "dog", but he didn't even attempt a fake ghetto accent, instead just lisping it in his white fratboy accent. He bragged about being licensed to carry handguns and how he would go hunting and shoot anyone who fucked with him. He also said he was 23, lived at home, and his parents would "kill him" if they knew he was on his way to NYC. They were talking about going to a party in NYC at a friend's house and were like "Shit, I'm nto staying in no (with disgust) guest bedroom. If they offer me the mutherfucking guest bedroom I'm goin' straight to a hotel, dog. None of that shit for me." and tons of other arrogant posturing that certainly wasn't true.
He was also the worst joke-teller in the world. He told two fifteen-minute jokes, full of (really bad) voices, such as a generic "retarded guy" who kept repeating the same stuff over and over, and nobody laughed when he was done. He fucked up about five jokes, telling the punchline first or messing it up entirely. The girlfriend and boyfriend were subtly making fun of him the whole time (the girl calling him a "loser" and then saying he was joking when he talked about getting in trouble with his parents) and at one point she asked him if he ever "fooled around" with one of his bus friends. He got really offended and started yelling about how he wasn't no fag and so on and so forth.
Anyway, the height of the night came when he was bragging about some stupid achievement or another and was like, "And my parents are both Albanian. That's right, I'm Albanian, straight up, dog."
I immediately thought of Azal and was like, "I now understand why he hates Albanians."
So I am with you now, Azal. Death to Albanians.
