attn: toby re: ranch

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I JERK OFF TO ARCTOPUS
Nov 8, 2001
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Ranch dressing is an American salad dressing and vegetable dip made of milk or sour cream, mayonnaise, and minced green onion, along with other seasonings. The original popular brand in the U.S. is called Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing, which is now owned by the Clorox Company.
Hidden Valley Ranch was a lively guest ranch resort near Santa Barbara, California, and it was there that ranch dressing was invented in the late 1950s by the owner, Steve Henson, who had developed it in Alaska. The original dressing is still available as a packet of dry herbs that is mixed with buttermilk (or sour cream) and bottled mayonnaise. Connoisseurs add chopped fresh cilantro as well as the usual scallions.






yogurt my ass.
 
Creamy Ranch Dressing
(makes 1 cup)

Ingredients
3/4 cup plain yogurt
1/4 cup mayonnaise (mayonnaise, AKA egg yolks, vegetable oil, and salt)
1 tablespoon cider vinegar
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
1/4 teaspoon ground pepper
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
1 green onion, minced

Directions
In a small bowl, add all ingredients; mix with a whisk until blended. Cover and refrigerate.

RANCH = YUM, heaven in my tummy, deliciousness!

the driver brothers sure are weird about dairy.
toby, try eating ranch dressing! there's nothing better. :)
 
i did NOT! i said, "yogurt, egg yolks, vegetable oil, salt, cider vinegar, dijon mustard, ground pepper, thyme, and green onion"...!! "egg yolks, vegetable oil, and salt" are synonymous for "mayonnaise". eat ranch dressing! it's really, REALLY good. i know you hate ranch dressing because of ranch doritos, but seriously, ranch doritos taste almost nothing like ranch dressing!

also, alex. dude!! what the hell's the idea here, ruining my attempts to dissipate the weird dairy phobias about ranch dressing and to introduce yumminess into toby's life!?! HRRRMPH. you are depriving him.

and you are depriving yourself from the yumminess that is ranch dressing.
 
mayonnaise has to have an acid too i think (vinegar usually?).

and that's cheap. that's like saying "here drink this glass of milk" and then when toby pukes because the milk has spoiled and grown mold and chunks you say "well the INGREDIENTS of spoiled milk i left on the radiator for a week are just milk so why don't you like it!"

i'm protecting my brother from being polluted by RAUNCH.
 
list of foods toby and alex BOTH refuse to eat:

1. mayonnaise
2. ranch dressing
3. blue cheese
4. gorgonzola cheese

upsetting.

hehe, idea: "fill a sleeping person's hand with shaving cream and then tickle their nose" trick, except substitute the shaving cream with above items 1-4. (or a nice concoction of all those ingredients!) are you back home yet, toby?
 
I have tried ranch before and I don't like it, so I completely back up the anti-ranch sentiment of this thread. Though I actually kind of like cool ranch doritos - go figure.
 
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