Have I ever told the story of my online teen romance? Probably not, as this thread was only a few years removed, and I wouldve been abashed due to the proximity of the matter.
Anyhow met this Joisey thot in an AOL chat in '99. As you guessed it, I was a troll and I called this thot by the name of BrwnBmshl (or something of that nature) out on some bullshit. Trollops love to be put on check, even if its in e-form.
Anyhow, this bint was an angel, by all assessment. A real cherub, and post pubescent thirst was real. Didnt have much luck with the ladies ace. Didnt help that I was a pimply faced 6ft 120lb teen whose shirt would wrap around his spine like a game of tetherball whenever the wind blew.
Ahem, anyhow one thing leads to the next, and Im crawling on my hands and knees through the Serengeti for love. Talked to her on the phone a few times, and just turned into Jello. This bint is in New fn Jersey next to the tire fire mind ye, and Im in Medellin Norte.
Ended up buying her a promise ring in pay pig fashion, hoping for a hitchin, or at the very least a britchen. This carries for roughly two months as the distance became too much for our youthful hearts to bear. (She called off the mummer's farce sending my innards into the proverbial meat grinder.)
Fast forward a few months, and I catfished her as a female htting her up for HLA (Hot Lesbian Action. In all our previous correspondence she claimed to be as pure as the driven snow. Turns out it will all a charade, as when asked if she had ever been with another woman, she claimed to have had 4 bush bumping experiences. Also claimed many a crab leg in her clam shell.
The A-Ha moment culminated with me revealing my identity and calling her out for being a lecherous lady of a web unscrupulously woven. Fucking skank.
