minxnim
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why would anyone fake having a disease that untimately forced the end of their career, the loss of their fan-base, the end of their sponsorships, and that would ensure they'd never get ANY ass again?
IMPORTANT medical procedure question inside!! (the_preppy? someone else?!)
- Thread starter xfer
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here is Dave's theory (see if you can find all 1203298392471 holes in it):
When Magic Johnson announced he had AIDS, nobody really famous and mainstream and heterosexual had really obviously had it before. Curiously, today, Magic Johnson is one of the biggest private landlords and property owners in the United States. Where did he get his money to buy all those houses and apartments?! There can only be one answer.
As AIDS swept across the country, President George H.W. Bush and his staff got together. "This is bad," they said. "HIV-positive people are being ostracized. We need to take some steps to make people think it's okay to have AIDS. Let's offer a robust, healthy-looking famous straight man ONE BILLION DOLLARS to say that he has AIDS. People will see that he's still healthy and be encouraged. After ten years or so, we'll find a cure, and say that we gave it to him."
So they approached Magic Johnson, and Magic figured, hey, that's a great deal! So he shook hands with them and accepted a card-table-sized $1billion check and went out and announced he had AIDS.
Unfortunately, Magic didn't realise just how much it would hurt his career, nor did he realise that no cure was easily forthcoming. And he couldn't just come out and say he was lying, could he? So he was stuck. But he was rich as hell. And one day, when an AIDS cure is found, he is first in line to get it--or, at least, say he got it.
"Dave, that's the most ridiculous story I've ever heard." Whereupon Dave narrows his eyes and raises a finger.
"But, Alex, even today they can find no trace of the virus in Magic's blood. SUSPICIOUS, HMMM?? HMMM??"
Whereupon I give up.
When Magic Johnson announced he had AIDS, nobody really famous and mainstream and heterosexual had really obviously had it before. Curiously, today, Magic Johnson is one of the biggest private landlords and property owners in the United States. Where did he get his money to buy all those houses and apartments?! There can only be one answer.
As AIDS swept across the country, President George H.W. Bush and his staff got together. "This is bad," they said. "HIV-positive people are being ostracized. We need to take some steps to make people think it's okay to have AIDS. Let's offer a robust, healthy-looking famous straight man ONE BILLION DOLLARS to say that he has AIDS. People will see that he's still healthy and be encouraged. After ten years or so, we'll find a cure, and say that we gave it to him."
So they approached Magic Johnson, and Magic figured, hey, that's a great deal! So he shook hands with them and accepted a card-table-sized $1billion check and went out and announced he had AIDS.
Unfortunately, Magic didn't realise just how much it would hurt his career, nor did he realise that no cure was easily forthcoming. And he couldn't just come out and say he was lying, could he? So he was stuck. But he was rich as hell. And one day, when an AIDS cure is found, he is first in line to get it--or, at least, say he got it.
"Dave, that's the most ridiculous story I've ever heard." Whereupon Dave narrows his eyes and raises a finger.
"But, Alex, even today they can find no trace of the virus in Magic's blood. SUSPICIOUS, HMMM?? HMMM??"
Whereupon I give up.
minxnim
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minxnim
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