It's geeky/nerdy humor, not for everyone, that's for sure!
"If I ever saw an amputee being hanged, I would just yell out letters. "
"I saw a transvestite wearing a T-shirt that said "Guess". "
"I wonder if there were any goths in gothic times: 'Hey, you look completely appropriate. You don't look stupid or lonely at all.'"
"A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.' "
"When people ask me if I have a Puncho I always answer: 'not yet' because I surly have a blanket and a pair of scissors at home. On any given moment I am 4 minutes away from a Puncho"
"Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time. "
"I think it's interesting that 'cologne' rhymes with 'alone.' "
"I think that when you get dressed in the morning, sometimes you're really making a decision about your behavior for the day. Like if you put on flipflops, you're saying: 'Hope I don't get chased today.' 'Be nice to people in sneakers.' "
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