my newest shitty song...

[The Burning Darkness]

Louder Still

Seems you have some unwanted company
Seems there’s still someone, something haunting you
When you’re alone crying yourself to sleep
Can you still feel them watching over you

Can you still hear them screaming
Can you still feel them reaching out to you
Recognize those shivers down your spine
Reassure yourself that it’s only in your head

Splintered perceptions
Plague the broken mind
Gently hissing the sweetest lullabies

Shattered dreams
Taunt the fevered soul
And yet the voices grow louder still

Are they only echoes of the past?
Meant to push you to the edge of sanity
Or maybe signs of what is yet to be
Warped delusions of your reality

Splintered perceptions
Plague the broken mind
Gently hissing sweetest lullabies

Shattered dreams
Taunt the fevered soul
And the voices grow louder still
----------------------------------------------

....any opinions, thoughts, criticisms?

 

[ForbiddenAngel]

Your newest shitty song??????????

Have some pride in ur work bro!

 

[The Burning Darkness]

often times people aren't critical enough of other's art, so i take it upon myself to tear myself down to rebuild a better, stronger....something.

 

[Tee]

I like it, it's better than the last one you posted here, I think centuries ago...

 

[The Burning Darkness]

Thanks, I really do feel as if this song came out better than its predecessors. It flowed like water from my head as well, that’s a rare occurrence. I think its because this one actually has a meaning behind it and it kind of just came from "within."

 

[TheSinMakesYouReal]

Don't feel bad, I am myselfs worst critict too.

 

[Ihreil Junkenstein]

nope, i am. YOUR SHIT AHH!

just kidding man!

 

[TheSinMakesYouReal]

What about my shit? Nasty bastard you.

 

[Ihreil Junkenstein]

Damn my spelling. Lets try again...
You're shit! Ahh!
That better?

 

[bonecraft7]

Sin, I think I know where you're coming from. After writing it on paper and looking it over it's hard to remember the emotions and the music you had in mind when you wrote the lyrics....so they look naked without the rest of it right?

 

[TheSinMakesYouReal]

Sin, I think I know where you're coming from. After writing it on paper and looking it over it's hard to remember the emotions and the music you had in mind when you wrote the lyrics....so they look naked without the rest of it right?

well not that in deeped. What I meant for the most part was unless it is off the wall bad ass I think it sucks. Most of the time I have to be told by every one that listens to it it rocks before I like it.

 

[bonecraft7]

Hrmmm I know how that goes, but be careful because you could be throwing away good leads and things that can turn into your best work if you trash if because lots of people say they dont like it.

 

[TheSinMakesYouReal]

Hrmmm I know how that goes, but be careful because you could be throwing away good leads and things that can turn into your best work if you trash if because lots of people say they dont like it.

I know.

 

[The Burning Darkness]

i've gotta throw some music behind this sucker.

the words just kinda poured out with out any distinct melody in my head.

think i might show this to my bandmates today, see what lil melody it might bring to their heads.