I think its evident that he is quite an amateur and with a personal grudge against opeth. Why else would be write so much text about an album he doesnt like? Also notice in the first paragraph how he talks only about the band and not the album. This isnt a review, this is like an essay written by a racist on the topic "Equal rights between black and white people"
'Watershed' review
- Thread starter Fleshimpaler
- Start date
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Heh, I briefly searched his page and notice how all the albums he has reviewed are über pure underground grindcore death metal.
Have a look at this review: http://www.unholycult.com/Intestinal_Disgorge.html
Band is called vagina, consisting of 64 short songs.
Here's the band's lineup
Pissy Bitch Screams, Gurgles, Roars,
Chokes, Sobs
Jacob Screams, Growls, Howls, Shrieks
Randy Bitch Screams, Gags, Chokes
Ryan Drums, Guitar, Bass, Electronics, Noise, Screams, Shouts, Yells
with song titles such as
15. Fag-Filled Furnace
11. Cumwhore
37. Pre-Teen Piss Princess
60. I Like My Women Like I Like My Eggs Beaten
Reviewer (same as watershed, obviously) claims this album to be "fun" rating it 7.3 (watershed was 5.0)
I found this paragraph particulary amusing
"Intestinal Disgorge is enjoyable due to the vocals. Combined with the guitars they give the music a punky grinding style that is catchy. Wild shrieks fuse Vagina with rude attitude, deep grunts are horrific, yelps make me want to watch the rape scenes in the movies Death Wish or I Spit On Your Grave, and choking gurgling sobs are as disgusting as they are hilarious. Again, as with the music, nothing about the singing is nifty, but these crude compositions are slathered together well enough to be vibrant."
I think the reviewer is either playing one hell of a grand joke, or just has some retarded rebell youth instincts clinging to him yet, he must be around 25-30 at least which just makes it all more messed up
Have a look at this review: http://www.unholycult.com/Intestinal_Disgorge.html
Band is called vagina, consisting of 64 short songs.
Here's the band's lineup
Pissy Bitch Screams, Gurgles, Roars,
Chokes, Sobs
Jacob Screams, Growls, Howls, Shrieks
Randy Bitch Screams, Gags, Chokes
Ryan Drums, Guitar, Bass, Electronics, Noise, Screams, Shouts, Yells
with song titles such as
15. Fag-Filled Furnace
11. Cumwhore
37. Pre-Teen Piss Princess
60. I Like My Women Like I Like My Eggs Beaten
Reviewer (same as watershed, obviously) claims this album to be "fun" rating it 7.3 (watershed was 5.0)
I found this paragraph particulary amusing
"Intestinal Disgorge is enjoyable due to the vocals. Combined with the guitars they give the music a punky grinding style that is catchy. Wild shrieks fuse Vagina with rude attitude, deep grunts are horrific, yelps make me want to watch the rape scenes in the movies Death Wish or I Spit On Your Grave, and choking gurgling sobs are as disgusting as they are hilarious. Again, as with the music, nothing about the singing is nifty, but these crude compositions are slathered together well enough to be vibrant."
I think the reviewer is either playing one hell of a grand joke, or just has some retarded rebell youth instincts clinging to him yet, he must be around 25-30 at least which just makes it all more messed up
Slynt
Lord and Liar
Nasty-Fire
Discursion
well to be a bit more gentle, I can appreciate if people cant accept opeth because of the growls etc its ok to "not like them" because of that.
This guy however, is similar to, like I said previously, a racist writing an essay about equal rights amongst black and white. He clearly isnt reviewing an album, showing nothing but subjective contempt towards watershed and the band.
Next!
This guy however, is similar to, like I said previously, a racist writing an essay about equal rights amongst black and white. He clearly isnt reviewing an album, showing nothing but subjective contempt towards watershed and the band.
Next!
I have been reading the petty child rants and it just ratifies everything that was written in the phenomenal review as it pertains to Opeth and their fans.
Another funny bit is the retard that wrote about stereotyping. Seriously, everything is a stereotype; how the hell do you think companies sell you all anything? For example, are you gonna see a guy in a suit selling a construction suit, old men selling Budweiser beer, or a fat guy selling fast food? C'mon, observe the world around you and stop being so fuckin' closed minded to the obvious.
Some other clown went on a rant about how the writer is an elitist. Dummy, how can he or anyone else that runs a site with cost from their own pocket be elitist. He or she is writing reviews, using the ol' first amendment rights, for EVERYONE to help them choose CD's. Damn, I guess going by your uptight judgment anyone that writes reviews be them for music, movies, toasters, food, video games or any other marketable product is an elitist. But the fact is none of that elitist innuendo crap or the insults levied at the writer would have happened had he written a positive review for Opeth.
in addition, some moron wrote down Mike's list of hero's and then tossed up the little puke emoticon. idiots, it does not take a ton of brains to realize he is being facetious about scum like Bush, although I bet all of you clowns were for Bush and the eventual war starting at 9-12-2001 and this opinion held till it wasn't cool anymore sometime in 2006 or early 2007. Anyhow, it is obvious the writer is bullshitting and he's even got a fuckin' John Denver picture up. Anyhow, I don't expect you all to realize what facetious means cause your Opeth fans.
Another funny bit is the retard that wrote about stereotyping. Seriously, everything is a stereotype; how the hell do you think companies sell you all anything? For example, are you gonna see a guy in a suit selling a construction suit, old men selling Budweiser beer, or a fat guy selling fast food? C'mon, observe the world around you and stop being so fuckin' closed minded to the obvious.
Some other clown went on a rant about how the writer is an elitist. Dummy, how can he or anyone else that runs a site with cost from their own pocket be elitist. He or she is writing reviews, using the ol' first amendment rights, for EVERYONE to help them choose CD's. Damn, I guess going by your uptight judgment anyone that writes reviews be them for music, movies, toasters, food, video games or any other marketable product is an elitist. But the fact is none of that elitist innuendo crap or the insults levied at the writer would have happened had he written a positive review for Opeth.
in addition, some moron wrote down Mike's list of hero's and then tossed up the little puke emoticon. idiots, it does not take a ton of brains to realize he is being facetious about scum like Bush, although I bet all of you clowns were for Bush and the eventual war starting at 9-12-2001 and this opinion held till it wasn't cool anymore sometime in 2006 or early 2007. Anyhow, it is obvious the writer is bullshitting and he's even got a fuckin' John Denver picture up. Anyhow, I don't expect you all to realize what facetious means cause your Opeth fans.
Nasty-Fire
Discursion
Fleshimpaler, are you that guy? I mean, why did you come here with that? You don't go to a church to talk about Satan. You know everyone here will disagree, and with good reasons, so the point of coming here is to... I don't know... show that were brainless (with is clearly not the case, logically)? And then what? Wait, the guy is right, Opeth is pure damn shit. HEY! It's music and you don't need an essay on it to like/dislike it. You feel it or not. Opeth fans aren't more idiot than anyone (and actually, there's no difference between them or anyone), they just talk about what they like.
EDIT : And I personnaly think someone who critics music or anything should try to be open-minded to let his readers their own opinion, to not make absolutions. That writter maybe has vocabulary, but isn't professionnal at all.
EDIT : And I personnaly think someone who critics music or anything should try to be open-minded to let his readers their own opinion, to not make absolutions. That writter maybe has vocabulary, but isn't professionnal at all.
burntoast
Member
- Jan 8, 2007
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What are you babbling about Fleshimpaler?
This makes absolutely no sense, but I do agree with you that he's not an elitist. He just doesn't like Opeth, and that's all right.
I normally don't point out grammar errors because doing so is usually equivalent to a cop-out, but when you're going to call other people stupid, try not to look like an idiot yourself.
He could be. All he does at UM is plug that shitty site. Pathetic.
This makes absolutely no sense, but I do agree with you that he's not an elitist. He just doesn't like Opeth, and that's all right.
I normally don't point out grammar errors because doing so is usually equivalent to a cop-out, but when you're going to call other people stupid, try not to look like an idiot yourself.
He could be. All he does at UM is plug that shitty site. Pathetic.
Why is everyone getting so offensive over a review? He's a critic and it is his job to review stuff in light of his own opinion.
Excuse me, what?
...*Reads the post again. Oh wait! You are saying that I'm a clown, a dummy and an idiot, aren't you!? That's quite rude I think considering that you don't know me at all. I'm also offended by the fact that you seem to be making accusations at me. That's not very polite at all. :/
Obviously the review is written in a facetious tone, I can see that, but I think the opinion is still valid (the writer doesn't like Watershed and dislikes Opeth fans), no?
Mr Samsara
Misanthropic Moderator
burntoast
Member
- Jan 8, 2007
- 515
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No shit.
Because we're allowed to have an opinion on his opinion, especially when some jackass who has nothing substantive to contribute comes to this forum with the intent of provoking responses.
burntoast
Member
- Jan 8, 2007
- 515
- 0
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Well, someone has to put him in his place before you drop the hammer (please do, by the way).
Holocaust on the Moon
Temples of Syrinx
Pure_evul
Member
After reading the first paragraph, I skipped the whole text and went to the last one, just out of curiosity about the review's ending.
The final line was enough for me to never visit that website again...
"in a band with no originality". And what's original then? All those mainstream nu metal / hardcore bands? Ugh.
EDIT: Oh yeah, I am so stupid, Slipknot wear MASKS, the originality!
The final line was enough for me to never visit that website again...
"in a band with no originality". And what's original then? All those mainstream nu metal / hardcore bands? Ugh.
EDIT: Oh yeah, I am so stupid, Slipknot wear MASKS, the originality!
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