Annoying Things in Metal Reviews

[The Heartbreak Kid]

Fuck off.

 

[ohiogrinder]

when they pretend that a nu-metal or metalcore band is unique and doing something different.

 

[The Heartbreak Kid]

Saying Fall Out Boy are Punk's new superstars. uke:

Please.....be serious?

 

[Saparmurat_Niyazov]

I hate that most magazines (especially independent 'zines) give everything that shows up in their mail box at least an "8 OUT OV 10 SKULZ!!!!111!!!". For this reason alone, a gore-grind band shouldn't even bother sending their demo to "Fucking a Gaping Chest Wound With and Infected Erection" magazine, because it will automatically be lauded as "album of the year" along with all of their peers in their genre.

 

[V.V.V.V.V.]

 

[cookiecutter]

So true DSE, so true.

 

[Dazed and Brutal]

Fuck off.

ME?

 

[nissan]

Someone agree with me, hurry!

 

[Saparmurat_Niyazov]

no

 

[The Bringer]

Saying Fall Out Boy are Punk's new superstars. uke:

Please.....be serious?

Anyone who says that obviously doesn't know anything about punk.







"Fucking a Gaping Chest Wound With and Infected Erection" Did you think of that yourself?

 

[Saparmurat_Niyazov]

Yes. Thanks to listening to Exhumed and Cannibal Corpse a lot, I can easily create super sweet gore titles.

 

[The Bringer]

That definitely explains it.

 

[nissan]

riffs

Oh :Smug:

 

[Mercy/Severity]

ok i read i review once where the guy wrote about 3 pages, but never once mentioned the actual MUSIC. He just ranted the fuck on about his interpretation of what it all symbolised, but not one mention of anything to do with the music? He wrote pretty well, but nothing to do with the music = worst fucking review ever

 

[Saparmurat_Niyazov]

Oh :Smug:

Where in this thread did I use the word "riffs", you fucking short dicked gook?

 

[nissan]

Where in this thread did I use the word "riffs", you fucking short dicked gook?

Lol, please agree with me - I need this

 

[V.V.V.V.V.]

Oh also, the worst review ever is DanthraxNasty's review of Blut Aus Nord - The Work Which Transforms God. It describes the aesthetic approach for at least 4 PARAGRAPHS with NO (NO) REFERENCE TO THE MUSIC. AND once he does get to the music, he calls it stuff like "typical euro metal" or something which makes me think he bought what he thought was the CD but actually got like a Rhapsody CD or something?? Worst...review...ever.

 

[CF87]

I hate people who spend time giving a review just to give the album a 50% or whatever.

 

[V.V.V.V.V.]

What? You hate people who give a fair and just look at an album but end up giving it a terminally average grade? That's silly...

 

[cookiecutter]

ok i read i review once where the guy wrote about 3 pages, but never once mentioned the actual MUSIC. He just ranted the fuck on about his interpretation of what it all symbolised, but not one mention of anything to do with the music? He wrote pretty well, but nothing to do with the music = worst fucking review ever

you mean anus.com?