Currently gorging upon and absolutely LOVING...

I'd like to take this time to apologize to all the onions I may have offended in the past with my negative attitude and outlook towards their existence. I was young, dumb, and ignorant and I have finally learned the err of my ways. I am truly sorry.

I'm not saying that we're going to best friends now, dear onion, but I do think it's going to be nice to not have to worry about the awkwardness when we run into each other at parties anymore.
 
What made you so reckless as to add onions to your stir fry?
 
I hated the fact that I hated them. Or at least thought I hated them enough to be unwilling to include them in anything I eat.
 
Well sir you made a good choice. I cook onions into almost everything.
 
Still can't eat them, I've tried. I don't like their flavor, in pretty much 99% of all contexts.

Edit: Ok in stir fry, onion RINGS, and on the Bleu Ribbon. Not really anywhere else.