Belial
Rainbow Demon
tenebrose
Ceramic Goddess
Well, I approve of monogamy... 
I approve of polyamoura as well (although I'm still out on bigamy and polygamy), but I'm not sure I could personally be in a polyamorous relationship.
I approve of polyamoura as well (although I'm still out on bigamy and polygamy), but I'm not sure I could personally be in a polyamorous relationship.
HoserHellspawn
Pixel Manipulator
...since when did it become my place to "approve"?
"What honey, you think we should have sex exclusively with each other? ...I guess that's okay..."
I dunno. If I was in a relationship that called for it, then I'd definately expect it of myself and my partner, yes. Although, I'd certainly like to experience some variety before, and in-between.
"What honey, you think we should have sex exclusively with each other? ...I guess that's okay..."
I dunno. If I was in a relationship that called for it, then I'd definately expect it of myself and my partner, yes. Although, I'd certainly like to experience some variety before, and in-between
.
Lina
kickass elizabethan style
Wolff, have you and your girlfriends been on the same page, as far as not wanting an emotional relationship? Or could they not tolerate it and broke up with you? (Either way, I guess you get your way.)
Some girls might tell you they're OK with a purely sexual relationship, but I would question them a bit, pry into their past. I'd bet there was some abuse -- or that maybe they're just saying what they think you want to hear, out of insecurity. It's simply a fact that, by and large, women and men are wired differently -- Satori laid it out perfectly in the "Thank you" thread several months ago.
Not attacking at all...just trying to spark a discussion.
Some girls might tell you they're OK with a purely sexual relationship, but I would question them a bit, pry into their past. I'd bet there was some abuse -- or that maybe they're just saying what they think you want to hear, out of insecurity. It's simply a fact that, by and large, women and men are wired differently -- Satori laid it out perfectly in the "Thank you" thread several months ago.
Not attacking at all...just trying to spark a discussion.
BillowOfZeal
and I looked up her skirt
Blackspirit
there are no words left
I'll just say "yes" as well >)
And I want to add; I can not see
myself with another man ever.
Maybe I'll change my mind in the
future, but right now,this is what
I feel is right.
I liked this -->
)And I want to add; I can not see
myself with another man ever.
Maybe I'll change my mind in the
future, but right now,this is what
I feel is right.
I liked this -->
Wolff
New Metal Member
- May 9, 2001
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Originally posted by Lina
Wolff, have you and your girlfriends been on the same page, as far as not wanting an emotional relationship? Or could they not tolerate it and broke up with you? (Either way, I guess you get your way.)
Some girls might tell you they're OK with a purely sexual relationship, but I would question them a bit, pry into their past. I'd bet there was some abuse -- or that maybe they're just saying what they think you want to hear, out of insecurity. It's simply a fact that, by and large, women and men are wired differently -- Satori laid it out perfectly in the "Thank you" thread several months ago.
Not attacking at all...just trying to spark a discussion.
Hah,
I don't trust women. I don't trust myself either. I think there's always something better out there, and there's no point in holding back. Once you start a relationship on that premise, it tends to be much healthier (at for me).
Consider these two scenarios:
Maryjane and I are dating, and having a serious relationship for over 6 months. We're attracted intellectually, sensually and physically. We live nearby, and see each other often.
(i)Now, let's suppose she or I had a fling with someone else. Should we break up?
(ii)Suppose, she or I fancy someone else. A casual glimpse, a slight flirtation, a little touching..., but nothing else. Should we break up?
Of the two situations, which do you prefer? The first one, acting out on a fantasy, getting it out of the system, and going on with life, or the second one, "cheating" with your mind, being weighed by "what if", and taking that pent-up anger/emotion on your lover.
I'm convinced (i) is healthier.
What's the point of a relationship if it supresses people? And why throw away a relationship because of a casual fuck. Who gives a fuck? (no pun intended). If you love someone, set them free.
Belial
Rainbow Demon
If casual fucking becomes neccesary in a relationship, then it' not much of a relationship in my opinion.
Lina
kickass elizabethan style
I'd like to point out that in both scenarios, you broke up. So you're right, of those two, I'd choose the first scenario, because the relationship was doomed anyway.
But what if you came across a girl that you actually wanted to spend your life with? I want to spend my life with my boyfriend. Sure, I get crushes on other people, I play through "what if" scenarios in my mind, etc -- as does he, I'm sure -- but in the end, I like what I have now and I wouldn't trade it. So those fantasies stay just that. Yes, possibly I lose out on the thrill of the chase, etc, but what I get instead is much more rewarding and profound.
By no means am I preaching to you. This is a personal thing, different for everyone. What's good for me maybe isn't good for you.
My main question to you wasn't why you're this way -- I'm simply wondering if you've found girlfriends that agree with you, or if they wind up being crushed when you're ready to taste a different flavor.
Belial
Rainbow Demon
MetalManCPA
Papa Opeth
The definition of "relationship" is different for each person. One can have several "relationships", and that may be all that person needs.
Because I believe in momogamy, and that I happened to find that "soul mate" so to speak, being monogamous becomes natural - part of me. If being the "swinging" type works for you - I see no harm. Of course, the other person in the relationship also has to agrree to be non-monogamous - or you become hurtful - and that's wrong. Hurting someone else for your own pleasure is purely selfish. It takes two in ANY kind of relationship - and both must be on the same page.
Because I believe in momogamy, and that I happened to find that "soul mate" so to speak, being monogamous becomes natural - part of me. If being the "swinging" type works for you - I see no harm. Of course, the other person in the relationship also has to agrree to be non-monogamous - or you become hurtful - and that's wrong. Hurting someone else for your own pleasure is purely selfish. It takes two in ANY kind of relationship - and both must be on the same page.
Belial
Rainbow Demon
Originally posted by Wolff
I called you sunshine, not Sunshine.
Ooooh. ok. You're excused then.
Lina
kickass elizabethan style
I think I already answered it, didn't I?
I said, yes, I get crushes but they aren't worth acting on because I'm much happier overall with my boyfriend than I could see myself being with anyone I've ever met or could even imagine meeting. If he cheated on me, well, I don't know what would happen, honestly. We would certainly have something to discuss, because if he was truly happy with me he'd pay me enough respect to not hurt me.
I agree with Metalmancpa, any behavior is fine as long as both partners understand and are ok with it. Which is why I asked you the question you seem to be avoiding.
Wolff
New Metal Member
- May 9, 2001
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First part of the question: I don't ever think of settling down. I don't like restrictions. I don't like boundaries. I'd like to live life to the fullest. Moderation is for monks, and I fucking hate religion. I don't see the point of settling for one person. No matter how exquisite, it gets boring (hence the caviar analogy).
Second part: some chicks understand it, some don't. That's okay. Not my concern in life. I had my share of disappointments too. Time to move on.
Wolff
New Metal Member
- May 9, 2001
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Originally posted by Lina
I think I already answered it, didn't I?
If he cheated on me, well, I don't know what would happen, honestly. We would certainly have something to discuss, because if he was truly happy with me he'd pay me enough respect to not hurt me.
It seems you'd both be happier if you got the crushes out of the system. Eyes closed shut anyone?
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