How is this translating.

I'm in no way an expert on this, so my opinion could be crap.

I'd say the vocals need more presence, it sounds like they're layered on as another track and they're high at one point and low at another, and it randomly jumps out at you when they should be in your face all the time.
 
Sure thing....expert or not your ears don't lie so appreciate you taking a moment to listen and critique.

I personally am not fond of the dbl vocal layer however the key's player and vocalist requested it so i left it in.

I'll see if anyone else chips in with some feedback and if time allowes perhaps make some tweaks here and there.