If you're tempted to rent the travesty of a remake that is "The Hitcher", I urge you: do not.
If you're allergic to spoilers, stop reading now:
I'm not going to bother with a point description of the movie. Instead I am going to point out why it sucks so much and save everybody some bandwidth.
To start, the movie begins innocuously enough. A college couple meets to carry out a solid spring break of drinking and fucking. Then it slides down the tubes. You can almost feel the invisible stamp on the boyfriend's forehead that says "MEAT"; with his silly feathered emo hair and chinbeard. The girlfriend is too leggy to die. "Jim" is aggressively non-creepy--while the girlfriend (whose name I forget because I was usually staring at her boobs whilst she was on-screen). Long story short, they stop on their road trip at a gas station and meet a man they had nearly hit earlier ( who is, of course simply laying a trap for his victims). They escape with their lives, because Killer Man, (who I wouldn't pick up even if paid a solid sum) is flung through the windshield. Next afternoon, they just happen to notice Killer in the back of a passing car with a happy-go-lucky Jesus loving family. They don't succeed in saving the family from brutal slaughter, but instead, when trying to help the only survivor, only manage to get Tenacious K to kill the staff of the rest stop they are at. They manage to get arrested by the local browns because them folks don't take kindly to murderin'. K depopulates the police station, naturally. They escape (too detailed to explain), the Smokies, somehow aware that there's been a mass killing nearby, swarm the police station. The couple flees, desperately trying to find a place to hide. They decide to sort things out with the police, who are conveniently searching the area. Things turn sour, and the girl is in the middle of forcing the cop into the back of his own cruiser when Mr. Killer uses a high-powered rifle (I'm not kidding) to snipe the cop, which of course pisses off the captain, who is listening by radio. Things go on at this ridiculous level for the rest of the movie. At one point, our favorite villain manages to take out an entire squad of highway patrol and their air support in a matter of seconds using only a hand pistol and a muscle car. I learned that in order to make large police cruisers fly into the air and explode like TNT laced cardboard boxes one only has to nudge them gently with a Trans-Am at high speed.
On second thought you might want to pirate this movie just to see emo-boy get ripped apart by drawing. If you could care less, don't bother with the movie, either.
If you're allergic to spoilers, stop reading now:
I'm not going to bother with a point description of the movie. Instead I am going to point out why it sucks so much and save everybody some bandwidth.
To start, the movie begins innocuously enough. A college couple meets to carry out a solid spring break of drinking and fucking. Then it slides down the tubes. You can almost feel the invisible stamp on the boyfriend's forehead that says "MEAT"; with his silly feathered emo hair and chinbeard. The girlfriend is too leggy to die. "Jim" is aggressively non-creepy--while the girlfriend (whose name I forget because I was usually staring at her boobs whilst she was on-screen). Long story short, they stop on their road trip at a gas station and meet a man they had nearly hit earlier ( who is, of course simply laying a trap for his victims). They escape with their lives, because Killer Man, (who I wouldn't pick up even if paid a solid sum) is flung through the windshield. Next afternoon, they just happen to notice Killer in the back of a passing car with a happy-go-lucky Jesus loving family. They don't succeed in saving the family from brutal slaughter, but instead, when trying to help the only survivor, only manage to get Tenacious K to kill the staff of the rest stop they are at. They manage to get arrested by the local browns because them folks don't take kindly to murderin'. K depopulates the police station, naturally. They escape (too detailed to explain), the Smokies, somehow aware that there's been a mass killing nearby, swarm the police station. The couple flees, desperately trying to find a place to hide. They decide to sort things out with the police, who are conveniently searching the area. Things turn sour, and the girl is in the middle of forcing the cop into the back of his own cruiser when Mr. Killer uses a high-powered rifle (I'm not kidding) to snipe the cop, which of course pisses off the captain, who is listening by radio. Things go on at this ridiculous level for the rest of the movie. At one point, our favorite villain manages to take out an entire squad of highway patrol and their air support in a matter of seconds using only a hand pistol and a muscle car. I learned that in order to make large police cruisers fly into the air and explode like TNT laced cardboard boxes one only has to nudge them gently with a Trans-Am at high speed.
On second thought you might want to pirate this movie just to see emo-boy get ripped apart by drawing. If you could care less, don't bother with the movie, either.
