- Jan 6, 2004
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So I was getting my weekly dose of televangelism this morning and the first thing I hear concerns Iran: how we, as Americans, if we want to stay in good favor with God, MUST invade Iran. One of the reasons was because Iran is believed to have something called an EMP, an Electromagnetic Pulse that can destroy all power in America in a billionth of a second, "destroying electrons" and "bathing everyone in gamma rays." It will make all electricity in America obsolete and our empire will fall. The congregation was enthralled, I smelled bullshit. So I did what any curious individual would do: I looked it up. I learned the following:
- First the obvious: it doesn't create Gamma rays, which I'm pretty sure would just kill everyone. It doesn't destroy electrons... apparently this preacher is not aware that electrons are... well... EVERYWHERE, and this idea is ridiculous as in "1950s sci-fi film" ridiculous.
- An attack with an EMP would likely have to come from a plane or a surface-to-air type deal from a short radius. Per wikipedia: "This would limit the EMP effect because the height of the explosion would be much lower than that needed to be above the visual horizon of the entire United States. Also, the power of the weapons would typically be hundreds if not thousands of times smaller than optimum, and thus the effect would be significantly smaller than that of a larger weapon. Thus, scenarios depicted in science fiction where small weapons create gigantic effects are not completely accurate, often having been exaggerated for the purposes of artistic license and dramatic effect."
- To even begin working on an EMP, Iran would HAVE to have a nuclear program. National Intelligence Director John Negroponte (haha) says that Iran simply does not have the material to create a nuclear bomb. The CIA's national intelligence estimate concluded that Iran was at least 10 years away from manufacturing nuclear weapons, if not more. Fuck, even the International Atomic Energy Agency inspectors say that there is NO evidence of a weapons program... and most certainly not anything as far-fetched as an EMP.
So it seems my bullshit-detector wasn't just going haywire. I put "EMP Iran" into a search engine and EVERY LINK was to a conservative and/or Christian website talking about how the threat of an EMP was immanent and that we must invade Iran immediately. It reminds one of 3 years ago when they told everyone Saddamn had drone planes with GPS maps. Apparently, people like FoxNews have peen pushing the EMP idea, playing on viewers fears that have been perpetuated not by RESEARCH but by Hollywood. Escape from LA, The Matrix, Oceans 11, War of the Worlds, etc have all utilized the mythical attack of the EMP, causing every southern American to shit his pants in fear.
If God wants America to go to Iran, He will have to find something that has a bit more credibility. But when it comes to fooling the American people, FoxNews certainly know what they are doing. It won't be long before Bush is telling us we need to go to Iran as "protectors of the free world" in hopes of combating an EMP attack.
*As a side note, I was watching FoxNews also this morning... they had a woman on there telling us that soaring gas prices were HELPING America because all the big companies could start investing all that extra money.
God bless conservative capitalism...
- First the obvious: it doesn't create Gamma rays, which I'm pretty sure would just kill everyone. It doesn't destroy electrons... apparently this preacher is not aware that electrons are... well... EVERYWHERE, and this idea is ridiculous as in "1950s sci-fi film" ridiculous.
- An attack with an EMP would likely have to come from a plane or a surface-to-air type deal from a short radius. Per wikipedia: "This would limit the EMP effect because the height of the explosion would be much lower than that needed to be above the visual horizon of the entire United States. Also, the power of the weapons would typically be hundreds if not thousands of times smaller than optimum, and thus the effect would be significantly smaller than that of a larger weapon. Thus, scenarios depicted in science fiction where small weapons create gigantic effects are not completely accurate, often having been exaggerated for the purposes of artistic license and dramatic effect."
- To even begin working on an EMP, Iran would HAVE to have a nuclear program. National Intelligence Director John Negroponte (haha) says that Iran simply does not have the material to create a nuclear bomb. The CIA's national intelligence estimate concluded that Iran was at least 10 years away from manufacturing nuclear weapons, if not more. Fuck, even the International Atomic Energy Agency inspectors say that there is NO evidence of a weapons program... and most certainly not anything as far-fetched as an EMP.
So it seems my bullshit-detector wasn't just going haywire. I put "EMP Iran" into a search engine and EVERY LINK was to a conservative and/or Christian website talking about how the threat of an EMP was immanent and that we must invade Iran immediately. It reminds one of 3 years ago when they told everyone Saddamn had drone planes with GPS maps. Apparently, people like FoxNews have peen pushing the EMP idea, playing on viewers fears that have been perpetuated not by RESEARCH but by Hollywood. Escape from LA, The Matrix, Oceans 11, War of the Worlds, etc have all utilized the mythical attack of the EMP, causing every southern American to shit his pants in fear.
If God wants America to go to Iran, He will have to find something that has a bit more credibility. But when it comes to fooling the American people, FoxNews certainly know what they are doing. It won't be long before Bush is telling us we need to go to Iran as "protectors of the free world" in hopes of combating an EMP attack.
*As a side note, I was watching FoxNews also this morning... they had a woman on there telling us that soaring gas prices were HELPING America because all the big companies could start investing all that extra money.
God bless conservative capitalism...
I told you to stop smoking the crack rock, didn't I? 
