Movies ... the porno edition

[NAD]

hahaha is that dude sneezing?

and yeah, pretty much any shot of the dude by himself is something i don't need to see. i mean i guess if you're watching it with a chick it's okay, but come on, in the 234958793579082375908u230iklsas89oiu2424 hours that men spend watching porno, how many are women around for?

i only watched porno once with some chick, a few choice quotes from her:

(dude shoots small load):
"is that it?!"

(girl gives extremely sloppy blowjob):
"swallow your spit, sloppy bitch!"

(black dude on blond chick)
"black winkies are scary."

hahahaha

 

[E-bortion]

black on blonde shit is something id castrate a man for liking (iffen he bes of white descentities) [/redneck]

 

[dorian gray]

havent seen porn since around the year of our lord 1342 but my favorite part, other than wacking off to other people having sex, was the sound. haha, the crap mics would pick up whatever the *ahem* actors were saying ever so slightly, so it would just be "mumble mumble". hard to describe here but im certain you know what im talking about. porn sound is second only to porn music, which, of course, completely rules.

 

[dorian gray]

gaping orifices

i HATE gaping orifices.

 

[General Zod]

black on blonde shit is something id castrate a man for liking (iffen he bes of white descentities) [/redneck]

Well, you have a lot of castrating to do. Judging by the number of titles out there, there's no shortage of folks into these flix.

Zod

 

[Dark One]

i HATE gaping orifices.

But I love gatherings... isn't it ironic?

 

[General Zod]

More stuff I don't need in porn:

1. More than 2 chicks with 1 dude
2. More than 2 dudes with 1 chick
3. More than 2 chicks in a lesbian scene
4. More than 2 couples going at it in one time

Logic:

1. I never fantasize about being with more than 2 chicks at once. Maybe it's because I only have one penis. Granted, it's a ridiculously large penis, but still, it's only one single penis.
2. It's kind of hot to see a chick multitask with 2 guys, but any more than that is overkill. I tend to think folks who want to see a chick with 10 dudes like it because they view it as humiliation for the chick; which doesn't float my boat.
3. I just don't see this as realistic. I just don't think a whole lot of lesbian 3somes breakout in real life.
4. I'm easily confused.

Zod

 

[cthulufhtagn]

3. I just don't see this as realistic. I just don't think a whole lot of lesbian 3somes breakout in real life.

you don't see the cable guy taking his pants off too much in real life either

 

[General Zod]

you don't see the cable guy taking his pants off too much in real life either

True. But the cable guy getting some seems a lot more likely to me.

Zod

 

[cthulufhtagn]

some cable guy getting random poon is more likely than a lesbian threesome? i'll respectfully disagree with you, sir.

 

[lurch70]

2. More than 2 dudes with 1 chick

so 2 dudes is ok then? ... just MORE than 2 is the problem?

 

[General Zod]

some cable guy getting random poon is more likely than a lesbian threesome?

Yes. If I was a cableguy and single, I'd be nailing horny housewives almost daily.

i'll respectfully disagree with you, sir.

Duley noted.

Zod

 

[General Zod]

so 2 dudes is ok then? ... just MORE than 2 is the problem?

Correct. That way one dude can get her mouth, while the other tags her from behind. You throw a 3rd dude and there, and there's no where for him to go, without a whole lot of undesirable contact, if you know what I mean.

Zod

 

[dorian gray]

ha, undesireable contact