OK, seriously, out of all the things I've EVER seen on the internet...

[Metaltastic]

This is still the funniest, bar none. It's old as hell, so I'm sure tons of you guys have seen it, but I was just recently reminded of it and revisited it for some food-choking laughs, and thought I would share the love. I give you...

The Saga of Bloodninja

 

[aramism]

there was a hilarious thing like in 2003 or so i forgot it was like an IM conversation between bush and kim jong il. or kim jong il and someone. it was the funniest thing ever.

 

[Chryst Krispies]

Oh my gawd dude. I had the shitties day and that just made me die!!!!!

YOU WANNA CYBER?

-SURE LIKE VEGETABLES?

Lawllllzzzzz

 

[grywolf627]

Damn, I was just thinking about bloodninja the other day and was thinking of posting it. I still ROFL when I read it! "I can no longer resist the pizza...." LOL

 

[Damian B]

oh my god, the pirate one is the best thing i've ever read, hands fucking down!!

 

[Metaltastic]

Hahahahahahahahahaha, yeah, that and the nerd one are my two favorites ("I tear off your wooden pegleg" "I ram it up your ass" )

 

[iamandy]

goddamn, i love the internet!

 

[FULLMETALSPEEDO]

Hahahahahahahahahaha, yeah, that and the nerd one are my two favorites ("I tear off your wooden pegleg" "I ram it up your ass" )

HAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!

I haven't laughed out loud like that in a long time. The people at work are looking at me like i'm a retard.

 

[SocialNumb]

Oh shit dude! I've had to walk away from my computer 3 times because I couldn't breath from the laughter. I'm only on cyber 4.

 

[GarethSE]

I PUT ON MY ROBE AND WIZARD HAT
"you again?"
"oh shit, i really should write down your names"

Still fucking funny.
SRSLY.

 

[Skinny Viking]

This isn't safe for work either

I'm completely unable to keep a straight face and people keep walking past my office looking at me funny

"I pry apart that battleship you call your ass."

 

[Habsburgs]

sweet17: Har
Bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!
Bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.
sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR


Hahahaha Thanks Metaltastic

 

[Chryst Krispies]

I PUT ON MY ROBE AND WIZARD HAT
"you again?"
"oh shit, i really should write down your names"

Still fucking funny.
SRSLY.

EVERYTIME!!!! Hhahahahahahaah I love that one.

 

[schismatic]

Bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...
Bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.


Classic!

 

[Metaltastic]

Hahahahaha, much as I do love that one, I think the nerd one deserves just as much love for how brilliant he is in putting himself in character:

Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.

 

[abyssofdreams]

Bloodninja: The profile pic is a fake.
Bloodninja: I use it to hide from the cops.
sweet17: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol
Bloodninja: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....
Bloodninja: Not to mention all the groceries.

 

[abyssofdreams]

this is so random

1hOttYeVe: alright then...I walk over to you and start kissing your neck and chest
I.F.: I pop like 16 boners
1hOttYeVe: what the f**k!
I.F.: what?

 

[Chryst Krispies]

I have a question..

Who the fuck was this mofo? What's the background story to all this and where did you first find it? I have never seen it before but I think it's fuckin hilarious.

 

[abyssofdreams]

Bloodninja is the AIM alias of an internet magician who trolled chat rooms in order to pwn 16 year old girls who wished to cyber. The results are some of the funniest pieces of literature ever to be spawned from the interbutts. While there have been rumors that Bloodninja's Powerword:IRL name may be "Jackson", His true identity remains unknown.

http://www.bloodninja.org

 

[EerieVon]

Might use this line:

To your light bulb I am the Thomas Edison of your sex. Without my light you would be lost in a sea of darkness.