Someone posted this over at the Sneap board and I never LOL'd so hard at the interwebz...
Try not laughing when reading these real notes written by parents from
an Alabama School District. Spellings have been left intact:
My son is under a doctor's care & should not take PE today. Please execute him.
Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick & i had her shot.
Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31,
32 & also 33.
Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.
Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out
of a tree & misplaced his hip.
John has bee n abse nt because he had 2 teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was
hurt in the growing part.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse ray friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
Please excuse Lesli from being absent yesterday. She had diahre dyrea
direathe the shits.
Paul was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
Please excuse jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because i
don't know what size she wear.
Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get
the sunday paper off the porch, & when we found it monday. We thought
it was sunday.
Sally won't be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.
My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a
weekend w/the marines.
Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold & could
not breed well.
Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed w/gramps.
Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
Please excuse brenda. She has been sick & under the doctor.
Maryann was absent december 11-16, because she had a fever,
sorethroat, headache & upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever
an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever & ached all over. I
wasn't the best either, sore throat & fever. There must be so mething
going around, her father even got hot last night.