Santa Claus and a Ball of Fire

[Captain Beard]

Would have been cooler if oOogie Boogie went out as Santa and terrorized everyone.

 

[Malergion]

Or if a Nightmare on Elm Street featured Freddysanta.

 

[Captain Beard]

THAT I would watch.

 

[Malergion]

I so want to hear Robert Englund say "Ho Ho HO, bitch, now DIE!"

 

[Captain Beard]

Would he stuff a tree up someone's ass?

 

[Malergion]

I'm not sure. But the setup would definitely involve evil presents and a santa hat.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

he'd use cookie cutters on people's skin, suffocate them with stockings, and strangle them with strings of christmas lights.

 

[Captain Beard]

This would be the best christmas movie EVER!

 

[Malergion]

he'd use cookie cutters on people's skin, suffocate them with stockings, and strangle them with strings of christmas lights.

Oh, come off it, he's not the Boston Strangler. Surely his methods would involve some sort of mutilation!

(edit: and just a bit of shapeshifting )

 

[Captain Beard]

Turn the dog into a skinless reindeer with antlers welded to its head?

 

[Malergion]

What dog?

 

[Captain Beard]

The random dog or animal they place as a pet in the movie.

 

[Malergion]

I think his MO is teenagers, not pets.

 

[Captain Beard]

We need a fucking reindeer, and he never dressed as Santa, so his MO is shit at this point anyway.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

Turn the KID into a skinless reindeer with antlers welded to its head?

fixed.

oh, and the antlers are made out of the bones of another one of the children.

 

[Captain Beard]

A kid isn't as funny. I'd not be impressed.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

We need a fucking reindeer, and he never dressed as Santa, so his MO is shit at this point anyway.

why do we need to stick to a story? i'm just having fun thinking of creative ways to kill people at christmas.

 

[Malergion]

What about Randolf the drill-nosed reindeer. He does Freddy's evil bidding by boring into his hapless victims. By the end of the dream, his nose glistens red. Oh, how it gleams </Pinhead>

 

[Captain Beard]

Too hellraiser.

Now, a HELLRAISER CHRISTMAS... this has flexibility.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

A kid isn't as funny. I'd not be impressed.

pets are just out of bounds, man. you should pick up on that knowing how many people on here are reduced to creampuffs when someone posts a picture of a cat.