Someone PLEASE kill this kid

[Erik]

Lolz the next Noltem song is "Trollskogen Jeg ar Skalder manniska"

As far as I can tell, that means "Troll forest I am power man"

"Skalder" is "skalds"/"scalds" like

 

[lizard]

I cry for my nation.

 

[lurch70]

hahahah .. this is funny stuff.

i like how his name is Orthon and his Violin player is Antony ... hey Tony, fughetaboutit

Colorado is so grim ...

 

[lizard]

Tony obviously forgot to concoct a grym and tr00 menacing black metal name.

 

[Ayeka]

I might only be a year older than this kid, but I am so fucking glad that I didn't turn out that bad.

For real? Shit

When I was 16...I think I was still jamming Beatles and Dire Straits covers...no, that was the year before 16 was me and my mate jammed in the toilet next to the music room in our school

Bless his heart...

 

[Henrik Main]

It's terrible, almost as terrible as ShadowOfDeath's projects. Read the reviews for some cheap laughs:

http://www.metal-archives.com/band.php?id=19770

Edit: I'd be surprised if this Dybbuk stuff isn't a joke. The demo artwork doesn't seem serious at all, and it's called "Nokken som hvit hest" which means something like "Someone as white horse". Dybbuk obviously plays on "Dub Buk", and Emperor Orthon is a pun on Quorthon or something. I HOPE.

 

[lizard]

I don't think its a joke. it's a paean, nay, a plea, to the masses to reject false christianity and embrace the pagan beliefs of worshipping rocks and twigs.

 

[Henrik Main]

it's a paean, nay, a plea, to the masses to reject false christianity and embrace the pagan beliefs of worshipping rocks and twigs.

 

[Erik]

"Nokken som Hvit Hest" is the title of a Kittelsen painting, namely this one:

Vnedvcated kvnt.

 

[Erik]

Also, NO WAY is this a joke. It's pretty poor, yeah, and his usage of Norse shit he doesn't understand is pretty laughable, but the music is NOWHERE as poor as something like Shadow of Death's crap. The guy can play the drums passably and his vocals are half OK OK... At least his drumming is better than Akhenaten of Judas Iscariot was on his first couple of albums

 

[Ayeka]

Kinda puts things into perspective doesn't it?

GodDAMN I loved those Shadow Of Death etc reviews

 

[MFJ]

"Skalder" is "skalds"/"scalds" like

Thank you! Quite obviously, I don't speak anything besides English, so I took a wild swing at it. His music could DEFINITELY be worse, but it's still pretty fucking terrible. His drumming abilities aren't too bad, but just the overall composition of the tunes has failed. What pisses me off is how full of himself he is...

 

[NAD]

What pisses me off is how full of himself he is...

RUH-OH!

 

[MFJ]

RUH-OH!

No dice, NADs...

"This is the official page of Dybbuk the Viking/Folk/Black metal masterpeice from Colorado. The U.S. has never produced such music before, Orthon (above) is 15 and working on the debut. He has already finished his demo album with three of his best songs on it."

did you ever see...

"This is the official page of Noltem the Folk/Atmospheric metal masterpeice from Connecticut. The U.S. has never produced such music before, M. Johnson (above) is 16 and working on the debut. He has already finished his demo album with three of his best songs on it."

 

[lizard]

please, someone please don't email him this thread's link because then he will unleash the unmerciful satanical wrath of teh evil.

 

[MFJ]

please, someone please don't email him this thread's link because then he will unleash the unmerciful satanical wrath of teh evil.

I actually think it would be pretty sweet if he posted on UM and saw this thread

edit: I lol'd at your NP, good work.

 

[NAD]

No dice, NADs...

"This is the official page of Dybbuk the Viking/Folk/Black metal masterpeice from Colorado. The U.S. has never produced such music before, Orthon (above) is 15 and working on the debut. He has already finished his demo album with three of his best songs on it."

did you ever see...

"This is the official page of Noltem the Folk/Atmospheric metal masterpeice from Connecticut. The U.S. has never produced such music before, M. Johnson (above) is 16 and working on the debut. He has already finished his demo album with three of his best songs on it."

Oh, that wasn't a hit at you. There's not doubt this kid is full of himself (I don't think you are at all), but a ton of black metal bands definitely take themselves way too seriously as well. I still can't tell the difference between real and photochopped Immortal pics.

 

[lizard]

NO GUYS DON'T COPY THIS LINK AND EMAIL IT TO THE INCREDIBLE EVILISHNESS THAT IS EMPEROR ORTHON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DON'T WANT TO WRITHE IN THE ETERNAL TORMENT OF SAAAAAAAAAAATAAAAAAN!

THRASSH METAL TIL DEATH RAAAAAWWWRRR111

 

[MFJ]

Oh, that wasn't a hit at you. There's not doubt this kid is full of himself (I don't think you are at all), but a ton of black metal bands definitely take themselves way too seriously as well. I still can't tell the difference between real and photochopped Immortal pics.

Ahh, than I appologize... I am just trying to distance myself from this crowd as much as I can.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

crappy, but you get the idea