Truckin' through the mall leads to arrest

[Captain Beard]

CBC News
Police in Edmonton have laid charges after a man drove his truck through a sliding door into the city's biggest shopping mall, calmly drove around for five minutes, then left through another exit.

The bizarre incident began at around 5 p.m. Sunday, when staff at the West Edmonton Mall heard a loud noise, they told local newspapers.

They looked up to see a blue Dodge Dakota wending its way through the Sears department store. The driver was wearing sunglasses, and a large dog was sitting at his side in the vehicle's front seat.

The pair left through another set of doors.

Both entrances were damaged in the incident.

Police stopped a truck in downtown Edmonton a short time later. The 35-year-old driver has been charged with dangerous driving and mischief, as well as driving a vehicle without a valid registration and insurance.

Animal control officials took control of the dog found in the truck.
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Nice. I had a dream I did that once.

 

[Captain Beard]

Also...

PITTSBURGH (AP) - James Henry Smith was a zealous Pittsburgh Steelers fan in life, and even death could not keep him from his favorite spot: in a recliner, in front of a TV showing his beloved team in action.

Smith, 55, of Pittsburgh, died of prostate cancer Thursday. Because his death wasn't unexpected, his family was able to plan for an unusual viewing Tuesday night.

The Samuel E. Coston Funeral Home erected a small stage in a viewing room, and arranged furniture on it much as it was in Smith's home on game day Sundays.

Smith's body was on the recliner, his feet crossed and a remote in his hand. He wore black and gold silk pajamas, slippers and a robe. A pack of cigarettes and a beer were at his side, while a high-definition TV played a continuous loop of Steelers highlights.

"I couldn't stop crying after looking at the Steeler blanket in his lap," said his sister, MaryAnn Nails, 58. "He loved football and nobody did (anything) until the game went off. It was just like he was at home."

Longtime friend Mary Jones called the viewing "a celebration."

"I saw it and I couldn't even cry," she said. "People will see him the way he was."

Smith's burial plans were more traditional - he'll be laid to rest in a casket.
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What the fuck.

 

[Malergion]

At NoBeard's request I reiterate:
That would make a great oil painting.

 

[Kvlt Wench]

How odd.

 

[mReEtTaIlRsEkD]

Hahaha.

 

[darkspot]

Maybe they can have him stuffed and mounted in the chair in his living room...

sidenote: "Mischief" is a criminal activity?