Two men walk into a bar...

[replicated]

The third one ducks. :hotjump:

 

[El Stormo]

*rolls over the floor*

...*due to seizure from signature*

 

[LORD_RED_DRAGON]

*rolls over the floor*

...*due to seizure from signature*

+1

 

[The_River_Dragon]

A hamburger walks into a bar, says to the bartender, "gimme a beer," the bartender says "We don't serve food."

 

[Chromatose]

why the long face?

 

[Chromatose]

rectum? damn near killed 'em!

 

[neal]

rubber she asked for so rub her i did, i dont work at the store anymore!

 

[LORD_RED_DRAGON]

rubber she asked for so rub her i did, i dont work at the store anymore!

 

[El Stormo]

If you're angry with someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

 

[Chromatose]

"it looks like you blew a seal!"

 

[neal]

hunchback?! i thought that was your asshole, your nuts are so fuckin high!

 

[Will Bozarth]

Throwing acid is wrong.... in some people's eyes.

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

 

[Valerie]

A man walks into a cafe, sits down at the bar and asks,
"Hey, can I get a beer?" The bartender says,
"Sure, that'll be one cent."
"One cent?" asks the man, "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?" The bartender replies,
"A nickel."
"A nickel? Where's the guy that owns this place?"
"Upstairs with my wife." says the man.
"What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
"The same thing that I'm doing to his business down here."

 

[MajestikMøøse]

I prefer the version that goes "a man walked into a bar and said ouch"

 

[MajestikMøøse]

A pirate is sitting in saloon with a ship's wheel attached to the front of his pants. Another pirate asks "what's it for?" and so the first replies "arrr... I dun' know, but it's drivin' me nuts!"

 

[Necromunchkin]

^ Ranks among my favorite jokes EVER

 

[replicated]

I had the weirdest dream last night. I tied underneath the back of this nasty old car. When I woke up I was exhausted. :hotjump:

 

[Dead_Lioness]

A pirate is sitting in saloon with a ship's wheel attached to the front of his pants. Another pirate asks "what's it for?" and so the first replies "arrr... I dun' know, but it's drivin' me nuts!"

!!!

 

[Will Bozarth]

What did the Jew say to the Internet message board?


Hi, my name is Karen.


....