you see, God really does reward the faithful.

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Eradicator of Dumb Teenagers

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Powerball Winner Puts Family, God First
Sole Winner of $314.9M Powerball Jackpot Says Work, Family and God Are Most Important Things

SCOTT DEPOT, W.Va. Dec. 27 —
Work, family and God have long been the three most important things in Andrew Jackson "Jack" Whittaker Jr.'s life.

A $113.4 million Powerball payout from the Multi-State Lottery Association is doing nothing to change that.

As an adult, Whittaker has always tithed 10 percent of his earnings to his church, the Church of God.

He now plans to provide $17 million, or 10 percent of his gross lottery winnings, to three Church of God pastors.

The pastors in Hurricane, in a bedroom community between Charleston and Huntington; in Jumping Branch, Whittaker's hometown near the Virginia border; and a third who now lives in California will administer a fund he wants to create to help the poor ignorant 15-year olds who live in the community. "These kids are morons," said Whittaker, "what they need is a good ass whipping."

Waiting at Yeager Airport in Charleston for a Thursday night flight to New York City, Whittaker credited faith for his lottery win.

That faith is also the bedrock of Whittaker's remarkable, matter-of-fact calm in the face of extraordinary circumstances.

"I truly believe this is an opportunity for me to give testimony about tithing and spreading wealth," Whittaker said before driving to the airport from his two-story brick home in a Scott Depot development.

Such equanimity, friends and family say, means great wealth is as unlikely to change Whittaker's personality as it will make him remove his trademark cowboy hat and boots.

"Anything he can do to smack a little smart into these damn kids is fine by me," said Deborah Morris, 53, who has lived across the street from the Whittakers for more than eight years. "If there's anything dumber than a teenager, it's maybe a stump."
 
If there's anything dumber than a teenager, it's maybe a stump

ha ha... that's hilarious... that's almost signature material :lol:
 
that motherfucker should just give me the money. all the church is gonna spend it on is fuckin child molestation lawsuits anyway. fucker perverts.
-neal
 
316 million dollars. That's 1 million a month if he lets it come in payments... Fuck sharing, fuck Jehovah, and fuck you, kind sir. Thank you, good night.
 
But, he took the half up front. What a cock puffer... Take the GOD DAMN payments, put them in the bank, and live off the interest for the rest of your life... What a putz.
 
Originally posted by NoLordy Capone
But, he took the half up front. What a cock puffer... Take the GOD DAMN payments, put them in the bank, and live off the interest for the rest of your life... What a putz.

Its actually smarter to take the lump sum, because the Time value of money decreases....there is a function on Financial calculators that does this...you actually get more money by taking the lump sum.

:mad: FINANCE 381 CLASS :mad:
 
Hmm... how could "God" help out when gambling is forbidden in The Elbib? I just thought of that.
 
Yeah, but in the old testament you're supposd to beat women who touch you when they're menstruating and stone your neighbor for working on the sabbath *that's throw rocks at them until they die, not invite them over for bong hits Neal* bible says too many stupid things. People use it for convenience and to justify their own stupidity and motivations. Like any religion.