You Swedes are in a whole bunch of trouble now!!!

[Captain Beard]

Why not just deport the crazy fucker under armed guards when he arrives?

 

[Conspicuously Absent]

where would be the fun in that?

 

[Captain Beard]

Ok, shoot him with semen filled paintballs. The semen must be of homosexuals, and heathens.

 

[Conspicuously Absent]

ooo. can we shoot the paintballs at Jon as well?

 

[Claws of Perdition]

Although he's not a swede how about Rob Halford and Fred Phelps fight it out in this cage of death, and with this Swedish drag queen on hand it could be seen as a win/win situation for Rob.

 

[dorian gray]

heh, Kansas.

 

[Nate The Great]

We've had big discussions about Fred before. All the "lawyers" that work for him are part of his church, as well as members of his family. In fact his entire congregation are members of his family. He has like 13 kids (2 or 3 have abandonded him, though), and they all have a bunch of kids.

The next time I go to Topeka (the capital of Kansas), I'm going to find this "church" and take pictures. Fred cracks my shit up! www.godhatesfags.com

 

[Conspicuously Absent]

why is it that the devout religious types have like 10 trillion children?

 

[NAD]

why is it that the devout religious types have like 10 trillion children?

oh man, you made this waaaaaay too easy!

DAD:
There are Jews in the world.
There are Buddhists.
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then
There are those that follow Mohammed, but
I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is:
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six-footer.
You don't have to have a great brain.
You don't have to have any clothes on. You're
A Catholic the moment Dad came,

Because

Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

GIRL:
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is wanted.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood.

MUM:
Hindu, Taoist, Mormon,
Spill theirs just anywhere,
But God loves those who treat their
Semen with more care.

MEN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
WOMEN:
If a sperm is wasted,...
CHILDREN:
...God get quite irate.

PRIEST:
Every sperm is sacred.
BRIDE and GROOM:
Every sperm is good.
NANNIES:
Every sperm is needed...
CARDINALS:
...In your neighbourhood!

CHILDREN:
Every sperm is useful.
Every sperm is fine.
FUNERAL CORTEGE:
God needs everybody's.
MOURNER #1:
Mine!
MOURNER #2:
And mine!
CORPSE:
And mine!

NUN:
Let the Pagan spill theirs
O'er mountain, hill, and plain.
HOLY STATUES:
God shall strike them down for
Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

EVERYONE:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbourhood.

Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite iraaaaaate!

 

[Conspicuously Absent]

so you're telling me that if I go in the backyard and blow my load on the lawn I can piss the old bearded man off?

wow, thats easy.

 

[Night Mare]

Over here in my part of Australia, Christianity has become a real fad, there are churches everywhere, and Ye Olde "conventional" bible-bashing has been replaced by a crowd of young people and their hideous "youth groups." These people are a swarm of metrosexuals who denounce the evils of drinking, drugs, premarital sex and *wait for it* METAL!
I never really got into that scene, mostly because I wanted to enjoy my teenage years, instead of avoiding all the things that make this time so magical.
Decadent is kind of new here on the coast, and got a huge shock when he started seeing teenagers attending church of their own free will.

Bring back fire and brimstone, pussies.

 

[Profanity]

^ your town will be ready for 6/6/6 next year.

 

[Night Mare]

We can only hope.

 

[Profanity]

I might even move there next year to survive.

 

[Night Mare]

Definately a good idea, except that I should warn you we have a terrible public transport system, so it may not be the place for you.