A joke...But, a good one!
- Thread starter Don Corleone
- Start date
darkladykleio
Member
sol83 said:Ok Mariner. You're screwed for good now lad. I'll have many surprises for you when you come here... hehe
That's what he was up to
Andy_2003
Member
pagan2002
danny cavanagh
customer: do you have any apples?
shopkeeper: only sliced ones, sir
customer: well, do you have any carrots?
shopkeeper: we have these fine sliced carrots here, sir
customer: well then, how about a cucumber? tell me you have one of those!
shopkeeper: we sell these cucumber slices, sir
customer: JESUS CHRIST! WHAT DO YOU THINK MY ASS IS? A PIGGY BANK?
shopkeeper: only sliced ones, sir
customer: well, do you have any carrots?
shopkeeper: we have these fine sliced carrots here, sir
customer: well then, how about a cucumber? tell me you have one of those!
shopkeeper: we sell these cucumber slices, sir
customer: JESUS CHRIST! WHAT DO YOU THINK MY ASS IS? A PIGGY BANK?
pagan2002
danny cavanagh
Whilst playing for manchester untited, David Beckham was having a poor spell, and wasn't playing well at all...
Alex Ferguson (manager): whats wrong david? your playing crap recently!!
beckham: ah boss, i'm not getting any sleep... i bought a jigsaw puzzle for my son and i can't do it... it's driving me mad! i cant concentrate on anything else until i've finished the jigsaw.. i mean... what will me son think if his dad cant even do a simple jigsaw puzzle?
ferguson: well get it together!!! theres a big game at the weekend and i cant have you playing like that!!! its terrible!
beckham: ok boss.
the big game comes and david plays another stinker...
ferguson: that was terrible david!! don't tell me its because of that fucking jigsaw puzzle again!!
beckham: yes boss, i'm sorry boss... but its driving me up the wall!
ferguson: well bring it in tomorrow before training and we'll get it done and then you can play properly again!!
david brings the jigsaw into training the next morning
beckham: here it is boss... theres a picture of a cartoon tiger on the front of the box, but for the life of me i can't solve the fucking thing!
ferguson opens the box and pours the jigsaw pieces onto the table... then turns and smacks david in the mouth.
ferguson: DAVID YOU STUPID TWAT! ITS A BOX OF FROSTIES!!!
Alex Ferguson (manager): whats wrong david? your playing crap recently!!
beckham: ah boss, i'm not getting any sleep... i bought a jigsaw puzzle for my son and i can't do it... it's driving me mad! i cant concentrate on anything else until i've finished the jigsaw.. i mean... what will me son think if his dad cant even do a simple jigsaw puzzle?
ferguson: well get it together!!! theres a big game at the weekend and i cant have you playing like that!!! its terrible!
beckham: ok boss.
the big game comes and david plays another stinker...
ferguson: that was terrible david!! don't tell me its because of that fucking jigsaw puzzle again!!
beckham: yes boss, i'm sorry boss... but its driving me up the wall!
ferguson: well bring it in tomorrow before training and we'll get it done and then you can play properly again!!
david brings the jigsaw into training the next morning
beckham: here it is boss... theres a picture of a cartoon tiger on the front of the box, but for the life of me i can't solve the fucking thing!
ferguson opens the box and pours the jigsaw pieces onto the table... then turns and smacks david in the mouth.
ferguson: DAVID YOU STUPID TWAT! ITS A BOX OF FROSTIES!!!
Cerulean
Not very cerulean eh
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