An Old Post.....Reposted.

T_man357

T_man357

Locked & Loaded
Jan 7, 2004
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The great "Old School Headbanger" (RIP) posted this back in the day...I've had it hanging in my office since that day and being in the ultra retarded liberal cesspool state of Mass, I get grief for it on a weekly basis. I think it's cool and is dedicated to the late OSH...

You might be a liberal if.....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you think the best way to care about a disease is to wear a ribbon...

If you think that pouring blood on a $1,500 fur coat is a sure-fire way to get your message across, but if anyone protests outside an abortion clinic, they're extremists...

If you think the New York Times is fair and balanced, but Fox News is ultra right-wing...

If you say "we" won the Cold War, but you opposed everything Ronald Reagan did to win it...

If you burned all your "RUSH" records out of principle when Mr. Limbaugh's show went nation-wide in the late 80's...

If you believe that the people in the fly-over states are ignorant idiots yet think that high-school dropout actors are political geniuses...

If you can't talk about foreign policy without using the word conspiracy...

If you think the Free Market is where they hand out Government cheese...

If you think Jimmy Carter's face should be on Mount Rushmore...

If you think the Flat Tax rate should be 95%...

If you've considered trading in your SUV for a Yugo..

If you'd rather own Birkenstock than Merck Stock...

If you would accept a car ride from Ted Kennedy...

You think homophobia is a far worse social disease than herpes.

You think Hillary and her village are better off raising your kid than you.

You speak out on the "evils of corporate America" but spend a great deal of your time at Starbucks.

You think the military ought to be holding bake sales to pay for weapons.

Your chest is scratched like one of Freddy Kruger's victims after hugging to many trees.

Your favorite Marx brother was Karl.

You take pride in owning a VW bus rather than a 2004 SUV (and still owe 10 more payments).

You think that a few more months of U.N. sanctions and Saddam Hussein would fold like rookie poker player.

You think anyone who doesn't find Will & Grace funny is a homophobe.

You think that it's wrong to execute a convicted serial killer, but abortion on demand is a constitutional right.

You think it was a stretch for Rob Reiner to play a liberal in "All in the Family".

You believe in more conspiracy theories about Bush than the X-files could come up with.

You think the black middle class was just a myth started by Newt Gingrich.

You pray to "The Woman Upstairs".

You really believed Al Gore invented the internet.

You looked at Yassir Arafat as a "man of peace".

You think that Bush is a flip-flopper, but Kerry is the epitome of consistency
 
Those are actually pretty funny! But so are these:

You Might Be A Republican If...
You think "proletariat" is a type of cheese.

You've named your kids "Deduction one" and "Deduction two"

You've tried to argue that poverty could be abolished if people were just allowed to keep more of their minimum wage.

You've ever referred to someone as "my (insert racial or ethnic minority here) friend"

You've ever tried to prove Jesus was a capitalist and opposed to welfare.

You're a pro-lifer, but support the death penalty.

You think Huey Newton is a cookie.

The only union you support is the Baseball Players, because heck, they're richer than you.

You think you might remember laughing once as a kid.

You once broke loose at a party and removed your neck tie.

You call mall rent-a-cops "jack-booted thugs."

You've ever referred to the moral fiber of something.

You've ever uttered the phrase, "Why don't we just bomb the sons of bitches."

You've ever said, "I can't wait to get into business school."

You've ever called a secretary or waitress "Tootsie."

You answer to "The Man."

You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.

You fax the FBI a list of "Commies in my Neighborhood."

You don't let your kids watch Sesame Street because you accuse Bert and Ernie of "sexual deviance."

You scream "Dit-dit-ditto" while making love.

You've argued that art has a "moral foundation set in Western values."

When people say "Marx," you think "Groucho."

You've ever yelled, "Hey hippie, get a haircut."

You think Birkenstock was that radical rock concert in 1969.

You argue that you need 300 handguns, in case a bear ever attacks your home.

Vietnam makes a lot of sense to you.

You point to Hootie and the Blowfish as evidence of the end of racism in America.

You've ever said civil liberties, schmivil schmiberties.

You've ever said "Clean air? Looks clean to me."

You've ever called education a luxury.

You look down through a glass ceiling and chuckle.

You wonder if donations to the Pentagon are tax-deductable.

You came of age in the '60s and don't remember Bob Dylan.

You own a vehicle with an "Ollie North: American Hero" sticker.

You're afraid of the liberal media."

You ever based an argument on the phrase, "Well, tradition dictates...."

You ever told a child that Oscar the Grouch "lives in a trash can because he is lazy and doesn't want to contribute to society."

You've ever urged someone to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, when they don't even have shoes.

You confuse Lenin with Lennon.
 
These actually are quite funny...I'm gonna e-mail them to my lefty co-workers so that they'll have a list of their own..One exception though....Anyone who doesn't find "The Simpsons" funny has problems that can't be put into words (Or no sense of humor AT ALL!!!)
SoundMaster said:
Those are actually pretty funny! But so are these:

You Might Be A Republican If...
You think "proletariat" is a type of cheese.

You've named your kids "Deduction one" and "Deduction two"

You've tried to argue that poverty could be abolished if people were just allowed to keep more of their minimum wage.

You've ever referred to someone as "my (insert racial or ethnic minority here) friend"

You've ever tried to prove Jesus was a capitalist and opposed to welfare.

You're a pro-lifer, but support the death penalty.

You think Huey Newton is a cookie.

The only union you support is the Baseball Players, because heck, they're richer than you.

You think you might remember laughing once as a kid.

You once broke loose at a party and removed your neck tie.

You call mall rent-a-cops "jack-booted thugs."

You've ever referred to the moral fiber of something.

You've ever uttered the phrase, "Why don't we just bomb the sons of bitches."

You've ever said, "I can't wait to get into business school."

You've ever called a secretary or waitress "Tootsie."

You answer to "The Man."

You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.

You fax the FBI a list of "Commies in my Neighborhood."

You don't let your kids watch Sesame Street because you accuse Bert and Ernie of "sexual deviance."

You scream "Dit-dit-ditto" while making love.

You've argued that art has a "moral foundation set in Western values."

When people say "Marx," you think "Groucho."

You've ever yelled, "Hey hippie, get a haircut."

You think Birkenstock was that radical rock concert in 1969.

You argue that you need 300 handguns, in case a bear ever attacks your home.

Vietnam makes a lot of sense to you.

You point to Hootie and the Blowfish as evidence of the end of racism in America.

You've ever said civil liberties, schmivil schmiberties.

You've ever said "Clean air? Looks clean to me."

You've ever called education a luxury.

You look down through a glass ceiling and chuckle.

You wonder if donations to the Pentagon are tax-deductable.

You came of age in the '60s and don't remember Bob Dylan.

You own a vehicle with an "Ollie North: American Hero" sticker.

You're afraid of the liberal media."

You ever based an argument on the phrase, "Well, tradition dictates...."

You ever told a child that Oscar the Grouch "lives in a trash can because he is lazy and doesn't want to contribute to society."

You've ever urged someone to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, when they don't even have shoes.

You confuse Lenin with Lennon.
Click to expand...
 
gaschamber said:
i have no sense of humor cause the simpsons SUCK!
Click to expand...
It's probably because you're a fag!!! But since you or your opinion
mean about the same to me (Nothing) you can go and cry yourself to sleep in between your sisters tits. Or open a vein when you get a minute...Believe it'll be no great loss to the world.
 
T-dude..Old School passed away ?...Sorry to hear pal..
One thing about all posters on here...were still here..EVEN THE FAGS!.
RESPECT except for the god dam cockmunching fags of course!!
 
nik said:
T-dude..Old School passed away ?...Sorry to hear pal..
One thing about all posters on here...were still here..EVEN THE FAGS!.
RESPECT except for the god dam cockmunching fags of course!!
Click to expand...
Nik, Brother...How you been??
Yeah, OSH is in a better place now.. But the dudes left us some hilarious memories.... Like the time he told Wu he had a 2 inch dick and Scott had no reply other than why was OSH so angry...That was my favorite. Or the classic USA vs. europe posting war, That was about six months of the craziest posting this board ever saw (MHFYRD was in on that too, anyone remember him??) You had a piece of that too Nik.. yeah there's definetly been better moments than it's having right now...Muffy, Jurched & and other hilarious bastards all M.I.A. Oh well...:loco:
 
T_man357 said:
Nik, Brother...How you been??
Yeah, OSH is in a better place now.. But the dudes left us some hilarious memories.... Like the time he told Wu he had a 2 inch dick and Scott had no reply other than why was OSH so angry...
Click to expand...
I belive he said he had a 2 foot long nut tickler on his chin. I could be wrong though.
 
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